Chasing dreams...

I envy those who are in their twenties and already are chasing their dreams... Actually, not really... I don't envy them, I guess because I am living a contented life. That has been my aim anyway. As much as I admire people with goals and dreams and those who really go after what they want... I find that somewhere along the way, they forget to live life and enjoy the current situation.


I, on the other hand, don't have a particular dream or goal. That is not to say I don't have a goal / dream. Quite the contrary, really , because I could think of so many things that I would like to pursue...i.e. creating caricatures for newspapers, writing a novel, designing artwork...

Nevertheless, I feel that I should be focused on doing something that would eventually take me somewhere in the future. But what??

It is really frustrating because I can't seem to decide what I really want to do! Whenever someone asks me, "What do you want to do?", I simply blink. Reason: 1) a blank mind; 2) a crowded mind with nothing outstanding.

However, not knowing what I want to do, does not necessary mean that I don't know what I DON'T want to do. People assume that you are open to everything. Ironically, I know exactly what I don't want to do.

That was exactly what transpired when the above question was posed to me by my boss. When I couldn't give a direct response, he decided for me and placed me in a position that he thought would be a great opportunity for me to explore. Unfortunately, the job was exactly the kind of thing that I have always avoided getting involved in. This time I had no choice but to endure it. I still am...enduring it, that is.

I suppose I could figure out what I want to do by employing the 'process of elimination'. The core problem is, however, that my mind can't seem to differentiate, or rather, distinguish between what I want to do and what is ideal. Right now, everything is in a grey area.

What I feel like doing but do not have the means or sufficient funds to do it is...
To take a years' sabbatical and isolate myself in a coastal resort to do some serious writing! *Sigh*...as if...

Is it the MUSIC or the MOVIE or the COMBINATION?

Isn't it amazing how music scores enhance a movie? Well, actually, it is not really something new. But watching all those Korean dramas, I realized that sometimes the music used truly complements the movie and vice-versa.

Sometimes when I am listening to a certain music that has been used in one of the dramas, it brings back memories or rather the scenes play in my head. I suppose the intellects would call it the "theory of association". And, well, yes it is. But still, music scores are really amazing. Music that would otherwise barely attract my attention is now something I am listening to repeatedly. Simply because it brings back memories of that particular scene from the drama.

As I am writing this, I am aware that I am blogging with the after-effect of large doses Korean music and drama, still playing in my head. ;)

Periodical addiction..Go Korea!

Nope, the earlier blog was not meant to be mysterious or suspenseful or anything remotely as ridiculous as that. I assure you that if I had indeed wanted to go all mysterious about my "affliction", it would not be as lousy as that.

I just wanted to start on that "affliction" on a brand new entry. Yes, I am a temperamental, peculiar being...so there you go. Anyway, as I was saying, it is more accurate to say that I am currently afflicted by a periodical addiction.

What am I talking about... Putting aside my guilt... I shall confess...*sigh*

I have been doing the marathon thing again! I know I am going to exhaust myself. This time it's the Korean dramas. Unfortunately, I think I am a hopeless romantic. Something I would never ever admit to anyone!!! For the past weeks, I have been consuming... yes, consuming Korean dramas. Specifically, the romance-types *chagrined*.

The Korean dramas in order:

1) Princess Hours
2) Full House
3) My Lovely Sam-soon
4) My Girl
5) Sassy Girl Choon Hyang

Each drama has 4 DVDs (16 Episodes each drama) with approx. 1-hour per episode. So count...the hours wasted...hence my guilt! That is not the worst part... The thing is that each of the above dramas have almost very similar plot but despite it all I'm addicted to them.

Sorry to cut this short...but I've got to go! Will continue later.

So much yet...

I've been neglecting my blog for quite sometime now. It's not that I don't have anything to say... quite the reverse actually. I have had so much to write about especially in the past couple of weeks.

But somehow I just can't seem to find the time. It could be due to my current affliction. Then, there is also the syndrome where my mind just goes blank when I finally decide to blog. The funny thing here is that I would have already prepared what I want write, thinking, "hey, i must talk about that in my blog". But when i sit in front of my computer, there it flies.

So, here I am, quite determined to breach that blank-mind syndrome by discussing something as insignificant as my current "affliction". Well, actually, it's not an affliction...hmmm...more like a periodical addiction?

Let me continue in my next blog...right-o!

Flightless bird by Iron & Wine

This song has a beautiful, haunting, slow-dance melody but lyrics that not many can understand. So here's a short rationale that I found on the net. It captures the meaning of the lyrics quite closely.

The lyrics:

I was a quick, wet boy
Diving too deep for coins
All of your street light eyes
Wide on my plastic toys

Then when the cops closed the fair
I cut my long, baby hair
Stole me a dog-eared map
And called for you everywhere

Have I found you
Flightless bird, jealous, weeping
Or lost you, American mouth
Big pill looming

Now I'm a fat house cat
Nursing my sore, blunt tongue
Watching the warm, poisoned rats
Curl through the wide fence cracks

Pissing on magazine photos
Those fishing lures
Thrown in the cold and clean
Blood of Christ mountain stream

Have I found you
Flightless bird, grounded, bleeding
Or lost you, American mouth
Big pill stuck going down

The rationale according to 'nachosgrande':

"There are dual themes running through this song: (1) an individual's loss of innocence/idealism; and (2) the degradation/dissolution of the mythical "American" dream.

The first verse sets our protagonist as an innocent child (quick, wet, diving too deep) - newly born, baptized, full of energy/enthusiasm, carefree. We get a glimpse of what's to come through the "blind" eyes of the adult world whom the child can already see seem focused on material things ("plastic toys"). The "cops" (his own adulthood) crash the party and he's forced to grow up and give up his pure youthful enjoyment of life (cut his baby hair). Thus, he begins his quest to find his meaning/life in this adult American landscape. For me, it also brings to mind the end of the idealism of the peace/protest movement of the late 60's...the system crushes the uprising...the hippies cut their hair...and wander off...going on to what?

Well, the second verse tells us exactly where our protagonist's journey has landed him...a big fat safe spot with the adults of his youth. He's achieved the "American Dream", or has he? Now all talk and no action. He curses himself and the wrong/injustice he sees around him, yet he idly sits and watches these "poison rats" (the establishment, big business, corrupt government) slither by and destroy his ideal world. He bides his time in his magazines, finding pleasure in viewing some advertisement of folks fishing in some idyllic river. He is not out there himself, but even if he was, he would be merely pillaging/ruining/sacrificing a place of nature ("blood of christ mountain stream").

It's a really depressing song, but it's certainly beautiful."

Enjoy!

Don't follow the herd blindly...

Here's an interesting article by Lee Wei Ling (daughter of former Prime Minister of Singapore - Lee Kuan Yew):

SLUMP TIME HAS ARRIVED
By Lee Wei Ling

In 2007, in an end-of-year message to the staff of the National Neuroscience Institute, I wrote: 'Whilst boom time in the public sector is never as booming as in the private sector, let us not forget that boom time is eventually followed by slump time. Slump time in the public sector is always less painful compared to the private sector.' Slump time has arrived with a bang.

While I worry about the poorer Singaporeans who will be hit hard,perhaps this recession has come at an opportune time for many of us. It will give us an incentive to reconsider our priorities in life. Decades of the good life have made us soft. The wealthy especially, but also the middle class in Singapore , have had it so good for so long, what they once considered luxuries, they now think of as necessities.

A mobile phone, for instance, is now a statement about who you are, not just a piece of equipment for communication. Hence many people buy the latest model though their existing mobile phones are still in perfect working order.

A Mercedes-Benz is no longer adequate as a status symbol. For millionaires who wish to show the world they have taste, a Ferrari or a Porsche is deemed more appropriate.

The same attitude influences the choice of attire and accessories. I still find it hard to believe that there are people carrying handbags that cost more than thrice the monthly income of a bus driver , and many more times that of the foreign worker labouring in the hot sun, risking his life to construct luxury condominiums he will never have a chance to live in.

The media encourages and amplifies this ostentatious consumption. Perhaps it is good to encourage people to spend more because this will prevent the recession from getting worse. I am not an economist, but wasn't that the root cause of the current crisis - Americans spending more than they could afford to?

I am not a particularly spiritual person. I don't believe in the supernatural and I don't think I have a soul that will survive my death. But as I view the crass materialism around me, I am reminded of what my mother once told me: 'Suffering and deprivation is good for the soul.'

My family is not poor, but we have been brought up to be frugal. My parents and I live in the same house that my paternal grandparents and their children moved into after World War II in 1945. It is a big house by today's standards, but it is simple - in fact, almost to the point of being shabby.

Those who see it for the first time are astonished that Minister Mentor Lee Kuan Yew's home is so humble. But it is a comfortable house, a home we have got used to. Though it does look shabby compared to the new mansions on our street, we are not bothered by the comparison.

Most of the world and much of Singapore will lament the economic downturn. We have been told to tighten our belts. There will undoubtedly be suffering, which we must try our best to ameliorate. But I personally think the hard times will hold a timely lesson for many Singaporeans, especially those born after 1970 who have never lived through difficult times. No matter how poor you are in Singapore , the authorities and social groups do try to ensure you have shelter and food. Nobody starves in Singapore .

Many of those who are currently living in mansions and enjoying a luxurious lifestyle will probably still be able to do so, even if they might have to downgrade from wines costing $20,000 a bottle to $10,000 a bottle. They would hardly notice the difference.

Being wealthy is not a sin. It cannot be in a capitalist market economy. Enjoying the fruits of one's own labour is one's prerogative and I have no right to chastise those who choose to live luxuriously.

But if one is blinded by materialism, there would be no end to wanting and hankering. After the Ferrari, what next? An Aston Martin? After the Hermes Birkin handbag, what can one upgrade to?

Neither an Aston Martin nor a Hermes Birkin can make us truly happy or contented. They are like dust, a fog obscuring the true meaning of life, and can be blown away in the twinkling of an eye.

When the end approaches and we look back on our lives, will we regret the latest mobile phone or luxury car that we did not acquire? Or would we prefer to die at peace with ourselves, knowing that we have lived lives filled with love, friendship and goodwill, that we have helped some of our fellow voyagers along the way and that we have tried our best to leave this world a slightly better place than how we found it?

We know which is the correct choice - and it is within our power to make that choice.

In this new year, burdened as it is with the problems of the year that has just ended, let us again try to choose wisely.

To a considerable degree, our happiness is within our own control, and we should not follow the herd blindly.

>> The writer is director of the National Neuroscience Institute and Lee Kuan Yew's daughter (Lee Kuan Yew is the former Prime Minister of Singapore ).

Middle Child Syndrome...that's ME!

Pretty accurate...
I should know!

Characteristics of the middle-born child:


"The middle or second born child or children often have the sense of not belonging. They fight to receive attention from parents and others because they feel many times they are being ignored or dubbed off as being the same as another sibling. Being in the middle a child can feel insecure. The middle child often lacks drive and looks for direction from the first born child. Sometimes a middle child feels out of place because they are not over achievers and like to go with the flow of things.


Being a middle child would mean they are loners. They really don’t like to latch on to a person in a relationship, there fore they have trouble keeping one due to lack of interest. Not liking to take the limelight for anything, they are not over achievers and just simply work enough work to get by, and typically that goes with school as well as a career. They are however very artistic and creative. If forced to use abilities they will work well, but do not work well under pressure. They often start several projects but rarely keep focused long enough to finish a project.

The best career move for a middle child would be along the lines of using their creative. Going into a writing or journalism career, and into a career that they could freely express themselves would be good. Anything that would have hours that are flexible, and projects that frequently changed would be good for a middle born child. Since relationships are not of high importance to a middle child, often times they are alone. However, the best possible match for a middle child would be a last born."

Source

Crazy about BONES!!!

Yes I am...totally crazy about BONES, the TV series on forensic anthropology. Well, actually, it's the two main characters that appeal to me. Booth and Brennan have a really good on-screen chemistry!

Love them both. I have only recently started watching the series on DVD. And just completed watching the whole first season. But couldn't wait to know about the following seasons.

So here's something for you to enjoy... I just love the wit!!!



Especially, the last part... classic!!! Just couldn't stop laughing whenever I watch it.