The Scribbler

Mr Perfect @ love-hate relationship with romance novels

2010-03-13T10:38:00.005+08:00

"The Perfect Man is pure science fiction!" ~ Jaine Bright in "Mr Perfect" by Linda Howard

The thing about romance n0vels is that it is addictive. A friend of mine once called it trash book, unless of course the romance took place in sci-fi and fantasy realms. Then, it is the by-the-way type of romance and so it's acceptable. Then, I remember what a local celebrity once said: "I don't read romance novels! I want to live it! ". Yeah, well, each to their own, I guess. But I digress...

Coming back to my love-hate relationship with romance novels, as adolescent as it sounds, I do love reading romance novels, probably because it gives a semblance of what love should be and therefore is the basis for my ideals of love (the kind between a man and a woman). The downside of romance novels is that they have the most wonderful Mr Right(s) or at least a definite Mr Maybe.

Well, honestly, no that is not the downside. The downside is when I am back in reality! In reality, no men measures up, not even a mile close to the definite Mr Maybe. Just knowing that the less-than-perfect heroes of the novels do not exist in reality is truly depressing and hopeless.

So, I resigned myself to reading my latest romance flick, aptly titled "Mr Perfect" by Linda Howard. (It was only recently that I started reading Howard's books and they are not bad! Suffice to say, I like her characters. ) This particular book was splendidly humourous, though it was the classic murder-mystery-romance types.

What I would like to mention in particular is the list of attributes for "Mr Perfect" , which was the topic of discussion between the protagonist and her friends, which ultimately takes focal point in the murder mystery.

Here is the list of 10 attributes for the elusive "Mr Perfect" (courtesy of Linda Howard's "Mr Perfect") (in order of importance and my personal comments in violet):

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1) Faithful (Hear, hear!)

2) Nice (Yup, one of those kind-hearted, helpful guys is a definitely ideal)

3) Dependable (Reliable, trustworthy..as the list goes)

4) Steady job (We, women, are after all practical) ;)

5) Sense of humour (what's life without humour, eh??)

6) Financially comfortable (Don't we all want money? Yup, another practical attribute!) ;)

7) Good looking (but not drop-dead gorgeous) - (DDGs would be a problem! So, settling for GL is just about right! haha)

8) GTB (If you hadn't guessed it already - good in bed)(hmmm...*whistling*)

9) 10-inch, though 8-inch is preferred as the balance two-inch would be leftovers (Warning: X-rated: LOL *blush* If you don't know what this is about...I'm not going to explain! *blush*)

10) Half-hour at least (Warning: X-rated!!! Oh gosh, that long!*blush*)

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Oh, but I do want to add another important attribute to that list:

*Intelligent* (hey, don't blame me for wanting my man to be smart!!) This attribute belongs somewhere between numbers 1 & 2 of the above list!

*Sigh* Knowing for a fact that it is all ideal and only happens in fairytales, I can't help but hope for something close to that romance. After all, life is all about hopes, dreams and living it to the fullest. I would like to enjoy these ideals before turning completely cynical.

So, where's my Mr Right?
"Yeah, well, like all the other male chauvinists, he got lost on the way and is too stubborn and egotistical to ask for directions!"

10 Steps to Becoming A Better Writer

2010-02-11T16:40:00.004+08:00

Here's something I got from the Copyblogger. If nothing else, you must at least visit this blog for its not only interesting articles but also the humour.

"10 Steps to Becoming A Better Writer by Brian Clark

1. Write.

2. Write more.

3. Write even more.

4. Write even more than that.

5. Write when you don’t want to.

6. Write when you do.

7. Write when you have something to say.

8. Write when you don’t.

9. Write every day.

10. Keep writing. "

I'll bet if there was an 11th step it would be:
"11. Keep on writing, come what may"...*wink*

Nevertheless, I can not and will not dispute the veracity of the above because it is the only way to becoming a better writer. And it is with much contrition I confess that I have not been practicing the above (if one were to just take my blog as any indication).

Chasing dreams...

2009-08-06T14:46:00.003+08:00

I envy those who are in their twenties and already are chasing their dreams... Actually, not really... I don't envy them, I guess because I am living a contented life. That has been my aim anyway. As much as I admire people with goals and dreams and those who really go after what they want... I find that somewhere along the way, they forget to live life and enjoy the current situation.

I, on the other hand, don't have a particular dream or goal. That is not to say I don't have a goal / dream. Quite the contrary, really , because I could think of so many things that I would like to pursue...i.e. creating caricatures for newspapers, writing a novel, designing artwork...

Nevertheless, I feel that I should be focused on doing something that would eventually take me somewhere in the future. But what??

It is really frustrating because I can't seem to decide what I really want to do! Whenever someone asks me, "What do you want to do?", I simply blink. Reason: 1) a blank mind; 2) a crowded mind with nothing outstanding.

However, not knowing what I want to do, does not necessary mean that I don't know what I DON'T want to do. People assume that you are open to everything. Ironically, I know exactly what I don't want to do.

That was exactly what transpired when the above question was posed to me by my boss. When I couldn't give a direct response, he decided for me and placed me in a position that he thought would be a great opportunity for me to explore. Unfortunately, the job was exactly the kind of thing that I have always avoided getting involved in. This time I had no choice but to endure it. I still am...enduring it, that is.

I suppose I could figure out what I want to do by employing the 'process of elimination'. The core problem is, however, that my mind can't seem to differentiate, or rather, distinguish between what I want to do and what is ideal. Right now, everything is in a grey area.

What I feel like doing but do not have the means or sufficient funds to do it is...
To take a years' sabbatical and isolate myself in a coastal resort to do some serious writing! *Sigh*...as if...

Is it the MUSIC or the MOVIE or the COMBINATION?

2009-07-01T11:38:00.003+08:00

Isn't it amazing how music scores enhance a movie? Well, actually, it is not really something new. But watching all those Korean dramas, I realized that sometimes the music used truly complements the movie and vice-versa.

Sometimes when I am listening to a certain music that has been used in one of the dramas, it brings back memories or rather the scenes play in my head. I suppose the intellects would call it the "theory of association". And, well, yes it is. But still, music scores are really amazing. Music that would otherwise barely attract my attention is now something I am listening to repeatedly. Simply because it brings back memories of that particular scene from the drama.

As I am writing this, I am aware that I am blogging with the after-effect of large doses Korean music and drama, still playing in my head. ;)

Periodical addiction..Go Korea!

2009-06-30T17:31:00.004+08:00

Nope, the earlier blog was not meant to be mysterious or suspenseful or anything remotely as ridiculous as that. I assure you that if I had indeed wanted to go all mysterious about my "affliction", it would not be as lousy as that.

I just wanted to start on that "affliction" on a brand new entry. Yes, I am a temperamental, peculiar being...so there you go. Anyway, as I was saying, it is more accurate to say that I am currently afflicted by a periodical addiction.

What am I talking about... Putting aside my guilt... I shall confess...*sigh*

I have been doing the marathon thing again! I know I am going to exhaust myself. This time it's the Korean dramas. Unfortunately, I think I am a hopeless romantic. Something I would never ever admit to anyone!!! For the past weeks, I have been consuming... yes, consuming Korean dramas. Specifically, the romance-types *chagrined*.

The Korean dramas in order:

1) Princess Hours
2) Full House
3) My Lovely Sam-soon
4) My Girl
5) Sassy Girl Choon Hyang

Each drama has 4 DVDs (16 Episodes each drama) with approx. 1-hour per episode. So count...the hours wasted...hence my guilt! That is not the worst part... The thing is that each of the above dramas have almost very similar plot but despite it all I'm addicted to them.

Sorry to cut this short...but I've got to go! Will continue later.

So much yet...

2009-06-30T17:13:00.002+08:00

I've been neglecting my blog for quite sometime now. It's not that I don't have anything to say... quite the reverse actually. I have had so much to write about especially in the past couple of weeks.

But somehow I just can't seem to find the time. It could be due to my current affliction. Then, there is also the syndrome where my mind just goes blank when I finally decide to blog. The funny thing here is that I would have already prepared what I want write, thinking, "hey, i must talk about that in my blog". But when i sit in front of my computer, there it flies.

So, here I am, quite determined to breach that blank-mind syndrome by discussing something as insignificant as my current "affliction". Well, actually, it's not an affliction...hmmm...more like a periodical addiction?

Let me continue in my next blog...right-o!

Flightless bird by Iron & Wine

2009-04-11T14:57:00.009+08:00

This song has a beautiful, haunting, slow-dance melody but lyrics that not many can understand. So here's a short rationale that I found on the net. It captures the meaning of the lyrics quite closely.

The lyrics:

I was a quick, wet boy
Diving too deep for coins
All of your street light eyes
Wide on my plastic toys

Then when the cops closed the fair
I cut my long, baby hair
Stole me a dog-eared map
And called for you everywhere

Have I found you
Flightless bird, jealous, weeping
Or lost you, American mouth
Big pill looming

Now I'm a fat house cat
Nursing my sore, blunt tongue
Watching the warm, poisoned rats
Curl through the wide fence cracks

Pissing on magazine photos
Those fishing lures
Thrown in the cold and clean
Blood of Christ mountain stream

Have I found you
Flightless bird, grounded, bleeding
Or lost you, American mouth
Big pill stuck going down

The rationale according to 'nachosgrande':

"There are dual themes running through this song: (1) an individual's loss of innocence/idealism; and (2) the degradation/dissolution of the mythical "American" dream.

The first verse sets our protagonist as an innocent child (quick, wet, diving too deep) - newly born, baptized, full of energy/enthusiasm, carefree. We get a glimpse of what's to come through the "blind" eyes of the adult world whom the child can already see seem focused on material things ("plastic toys"). The "cops" (his own adulthood) crash the party and he's forced to grow up and give up his pure youthful enjoyment of life (cut his baby hair). Thus, he begins his quest to find his meaning/life in this adult American landscape. For me, it also brings to mind the end of the idealism of the peace/protest movement of the late 60's...the system crushes the uprising...the hippies cut their hair...and wander off...going on to what?

Well, the second verse tells us exactly where our protagonist's journey has landed him...a big fat safe spot with the adults of his youth. He's achieved the "American Dream", or has he? Now all talk and no action. He curses himself and the wrong/injustice he sees around him, yet he idly sits and watches these "poison rats" (the establishment, big business, corrupt government) slither by and destroy his ideal world. He bides his time in his magazines, finding pleasure in viewing some advertisement of folks fishing in some idyllic river. He is not out there himself, but even if he was, he would be merely pillaging/ruining/sacrificing a place of nature ("blood of christ mountain stream").

It's a really depressing song, but it's certainly beautiful."

Enjoy!

Don't follow the herd blindly...

2009-04-09T09:36:00.002+08:00

Here's an interesting article by Lee Wei Ling (daughter of former Prime Minister of Singapore - Lee Kuan Yew):

SLUMP TIME HAS ARRIVED
By Lee Wei Ling

In 2007, in an end-of-year message to the staff of the National Neuroscience Institute, I wrote: 'Whilst boom time in the public sector is never as booming as in the private sector, let us not forget that boom time is eventually followed by slump time. Slump time in the public sector is always less painful compared to the private sector.' Slump time has arrived with a bang.

While I worry about the poorer Singaporeans who will be hit hard,perhaps this recession has come at an opportune time for many of us. It will give us an incentive to reconsider our priorities in life. Decades of the good life have made us soft. The wealthy especially, but also the middle class in Singapore , have had it so good for so long, what they once considered luxuries, they now think of as necessities.

A mobile phone, for instance, is now a statement about who you are, not just a piece of equipment for communication. Hence many people buy the latest model though their existing mobile phones are still in perfect working order.

A Mercedes-Benz is no longer adequate as a status symbol. For millionaires who wish to show the world they have taste, a Ferrari or a Porsche is deemed more appropriate.

The same attitude influences the choice of attire and accessories. I still find it hard to believe that there are people carrying handbags that cost more than thrice the monthly income of a bus driver , and many more times that of the foreign worker labouring in the hot sun, risking his life to construct luxury condominiums he will never have a chance to live in.

The media encourages and amplifies this ostentatious consumption. Perhaps it is good to encourage people to spend more because this will prevent the recession from getting worse. I am not an economist, but wasn't that the root cause of the current crisis - Americans spending more than they could afford to?

I am not a particularly spiritual person. I don't believe in the supernatural and I don't think I have a soul that will survive my death. But as I view the crass materialism around me, I am reminded of what my mother once told me: 'Suffering and deprivation is good for the soul.'

My family is not poor, but we have been brought up to be frugal. My parents and I live in the same house that my paternal grandparents and their children moved into after World War II in 1945. It is a big house by today's standards, but it is simple - in fact, almost to the point of being shabby.

Those who see it for the first time are astonished that Minister Mentor Lee Kuan Yew's home is so humble. But it is a comfortable house, a home we have got used to. Though it does look shabby compared to the new mansions on our street, we are not bothered by the comparison.

Most of the world and much of Singapore will lament the economic downturn. We have been told to tighten our belts. There will undoubtedly be suffering, which we must try our best to ameliorate. But I personally think the hard times will hold a timely lesson for many Singaporeans, especially those born after 1970 who have never lived through difficult times. No matter how poor you are in Singapore , the authorities and social groups do try to ensure you have shelter and food. Nobody starves in Singapore .

Many of those who are currently living in mansions and enjoying a luxurious lifestyle will probably still be able to do so, even if they might have to downgrade from wines costing $20,000 a bottle to $10,000 a bottle. They would hardly notice the difference.

Being wealthy is not a sin. It cannot be in a capitalist market economy. Enjoying the fruits of one's own labour is one's prerogative and I have no right to chastise those who choose to live luxuriously.

But if one is blinded by materialism, there would be no end to wanting and hankering. After the Ferrari, what next? An Aston Martin? After the Hermes Birkin handbag, what can one upgrade to?

Neither an Aston Martin nor a Hermes Birkin can make us truly happy or contented. They are like dust, a fog obscuring the true meaning of life, and can be blown away in the twinkling of an eye.

When the end approaches and we look back on our lives, will we regret the latest mobile phone or luxury car that we did not acquire? Or would we prefer to die at peace with ourselves, knowing that we have lived lives filled with love, friendship and goodwill, that we have helped some of our fellow voyagers along the way and that we have tried our best to leave this world a slightly better place than how we found it?

We know which is the correct choice - and it is within our power to make that choice.

In this new year, burdened as it is with the problems of the year that has just ended, let us again try to choose wisely.

To a considerable degree, our happiness is within our own control, and we should not follow the herd blindly.

>> The writer is director of the National Neuroscience Institute and Lee Kuan Yew's daughter (Lee Kuan Yew is the former Prime Minister of Singapore ).

Middle Child Syndrome...that's ME!

2009-03-19T11:56:00.005+08:00

Pretty accurate...
I should know!

Characteristics of the middle-born child:

"The middle or second born child or children often have the sense of not belonging. They fight to receive attention from parents and others because they feel many times they are being ignored or dubbed off as being the same as another sibling. Being in the middle a child can feel insecure. The middle child often lacks drive and looks for direction from the first born child. Sometimes a middle child feels out of place because they are not over achievers and like to go with the flow of things.

Being a middle child would mean they are loners. They really don’t like to latch on to a person in a relationship, there fore they have trouble keeping one due to lack of interest. Not liking to take the limelight for anything, they are not over achievers and just simply work enough work to get by, and typically that goes with school as well as a career. They are however very artistic and creative. If forced to use abilities they will work well, but do not work well under pressure. They often start several projects but rarely keep focused long enough to finish a project.

The best career move for a middle child would be along the lines of using their creative. Going into a writing or journalism career, and into a career that they could freely express themselves would be good. Anything that would have hours that are flexible, and projects that frequently changed would be good for a middle born child. Since relationships are not of high importance to a middle child, often times they are alone. However, the best possible match for a middle child would be a last born."

Source

Crazy about BONES!!!

2009-01-29T14:42:00.002+08:00

Yes I am...totally crazy about BONES, the TV series on forensic anthropology. Well, actually, it's the two main characters that appeal to me. Booth and Brennan have a really good on-screen chemistry!

Love them both. I have only recently started watching the series on DVD. And just completed watching the whole first season. But couldn't wait to know about the following seasons.

So here's something for you to enjoy... I just love the wit!!!

Especially, the last part... classic!!! Just couldn't stop laughing whenever I watch it.

A new foray...Maybe???

2008-07-30T16:25:00.003+08:00

Life has been monotonous here at the peak! Actually, that is my only complain about this place! But it's been a constant thought nowadays.

Lately, I've been thinking of going on a long break. I would like to travel overseas...maybe Ireland, the rainforest or some seaside...I guess I just want to break away from everything and everyone here!

I have been browsing NGO (Non-Govermental Organizations) sites like WWF, UN- related events. I feel like volunteering towards their courses. It will be like killing two birds with a stone. I get to break away and also assuage my interest in contributing to a good course.

But the volunteer expeditions are all oh-so-expensive!!! I've also been swamped with thoughts of finding a job with these NGOs. This is not the first time...It has been a recurring thought for the past few years, in fact!

The forest and the ocean calls to me and I am torn! I am torn because both are out of my radar!

I wish I could find someone who shares my interests and who is willing to partner me into an adventurous travel...somewhere, anywhere!

My dream guy...

2008-06-12T18:09:00.005+08:00

I finally figured out my dream guy criteria. To put it simply into one sentence...

"An alpha male who is smart, sensitive and will accept me like an equal!"

Yup...I know some of you are rolling your eyes at that contradictory sentence. I mean... an alpha male who is sensitive? Well, good luck with that!... An alpha male who will accept me like an equal? Like that's ever gonna happen in this male-dominated universe! He's an alpha male for g**'s sake! Nooo wayyyy is he gonna treat you like an equal! To top it off...he has to be smart...

So there...there's no hope for me...

Dreaming of a smart, sensitive alpha male who will be able to accept me as an equal is synonymous to looking for the perfect guy!

And we all know...there's no such thing as the "perfect" guy!

Probability of finding such a guy: 1 in a gazillion...

My lament: Every other male species turn out to be sooooo dissappointing!!!
Perhaps I should lower my expectations on the male species...considerably lower my expectations. (*grins*)

Alas, where is the sizzle and sparks in that???

(Sigh...even I will admit that this particluar blog is nonsensical rambling in the least)

I hereby declare that I was not in a particularly decent mood when writing this blog - blame it on Jayne Annn Krentz - for liberal thinking women who prefer alpha male types!

Hey, what can I say...women are complexed creatures!

Life, Oh life!

2008-05-22T18:11:00.002+08:00

Life has been, well, complicated...actually not really so...I must say it has been a G.R.E.A.T improvement from the Black Fortress!

But now I am beginning to feel restless. Maybe I'm one of those people who can't stick to one place for too long? Maybe life has been very monotonous here that I am craving to go back to school? Not a bad idea all things considering...It's only when you have started working that you begin to appreciate your days at University. After all, it is the only time where you HAVE TIME!!!

Gosh, I miss those days!

Enchanted

2007-12-18T17:33:00.000+08:00

Okayyyy...this is a long overdue review that I wrote and kept under draft until I remembered about it recently.

Here's my review on the movie "Enchanted":

It was a senseless, dense, silly beyond believe, inane and.... highly entertaining!!! I was really, really entertained! It was simply one of those mindless movies that you enjoy simply because they are MINDLESS!

It is highly recommended for those of you who are under pressure or need to lighten up your life or in terrible need to loosen up and just laugh!

Humour for Lexophiles

2007-12-18T17:03:00.000+08:00

Enjoy reading the play of words... :D

1. I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.

2. Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

3. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.

4. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.

5. The butcher backed up into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.

6. To write with a broken pencil is pointless.

7. The short fortune teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

8. A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

9. A thief fell and broke his leg on wet cement. He became a hardened criminal.

10. Thieves who steal corn from a garden could be charged with stalking.

11. We'll never run out of math teachers because they always multiply.

12. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U.C.L.A.

13. The math professor went crazy with the blackboard. He did a number on it.

14. The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky grounds.

15. The dead batteries were given out free of charge.

16. If you take a laptop computer for a run you could jog your memory.

17. A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.

18. A bicycle can't stand alone: it is two tired.

19. A will is a dead giveaway.

20. Time flies like an arrow: fruit flies like a banana.

21. A backwards poet writes inverse.

22. In a democracy it's your vote that counts: in feudalism, it's your Count that votes.

23. A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.

24. If you don't pay your exorcist you can get repossessed.

25. With her marriage she got a new name and a dress.

26. Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft and I'll show you A-Flat miner.

27. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.

28. The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.

29. A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France, resulted in Linoleum Blownapart.

30. You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

31. Local Area Network in Australia: The LAN down under.

32. He broke into song because he couldn't find the key.

33. A calendar's days are numbered.

34. A lot of money is tainted: 'taint yours and 'taint mine.

35. A boiled egg is hard to beat.

36. He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

37. A plateau is a high form of flattery.

38. Those who get too high for their britches will be exposed in the end.

39. When you've seen one shopping centre you've seen a mall.

40. If you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine.

41. When she was her first strands of grey hair, she thought she'd dye.

42. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.

***

Mr Magorium's Wonder Emporium

2007-12-05T11:13:00.000+08:00

Yeah...I finally got to watch "Mr Magorium's Wonder Emporium" with my friends yesterday. The movie that I had been waiting for since when I first heard about it (a month back) and when I saw the preview a few weeks back.

With much anticipation (if you don't already know...I'm a die hard fan of fantasy-based films), I went to the theatre with Bubbly, Teddy and Cherry. I thought we had the almost best seats in the theatre, (right smack at the centre of the theatre).

Unfortunately, what we didn't add into our equation were the people seating behind us.

Just as the movie started...we heard a loud snore from the back, which we promtly ignored...Then towards the middle of the movie we heard annoying, whining sound, from the back, again. I turned to the back and saw...the doom...4 to 5 kids. Kids who were restless and uninterested in the movie, accompanied by their mommy.

Then I heard a loud "burrpp!!" from my left (I was seated at the left corner of the centre aisle)...which was followed by a string of giggles. Hey, we came to watch a movie, didn't we?

It was (obviously) dark and thus I was robbed of the satisfaction of staring them down or glaring at them. So never mind...I continued watching the movie until it ended.

In the midst of all the whining, snore, burps and more whining...the parts of the movie which I could watch were pretty decent in overall. It was not disappointing but neither was it special.

My verdict: The movie lacked something...For a movie about magic...it lacked the magical element to fully grab the audiences' attention. It had a hanging ending...I kept thinking it could not have ended that way, there must be something more. But, oh well!

Time to move on...

My list of next must-watch movies are:

1)Enchanted
2)The Golden Compass
3)National Treasure 2

Well, that's all for now. So long, folks...

What makes life 100%?

2007-12-01T11:18:00.000+08:00

Here's something I found on the net...Ain't it soooo true???

What makes Life 100%?

Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%?

We have all been to those meetings where someone wants more than 100%.

How about achieving 103%?

Here's a little math that might prove helpful:

If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26

then:

H A R D W O R K
8 1 18 4 23 15 18 11 = 98%

K N O W L E D G E
11 14 15 23 12 5 4 7 5 = 96%

but:

A T T I T U D E
1 20 20 9 20 21 4 5 = 100%

and:

B U L L S H I T
2 21 12 12 19 8 9 20 = 103%

So, it stands to reason that hard work and knowledge will get you close,
attitude will get you there, but bullshit will put you over the top.

And look how far this will take you...

A S S K I S S I N G
1 19 19 11 9 19 19 9 14 7 = 118%

Think about it... and have a nice day at work... :)

Life's not so bad after all...

2007-11-22T18:13:00.000+08:00

Yup...not bad at all. Just the other day I was wallowing in self pity because my B-day was rather sad. But it so happened that I got a surprise birthday party by the people here. Sweet of them, isn't it!

They got me two slices of cherry topped, blueberry-layered cake, with 6 to 7 boxes of pizza's and french fries and garlic bread and soft drinks. Then we all shared the food for lunch! And I had no clue...it doesn't matter that they were one day late...It was so sweet of them, considering that I don't really know all of them very well. It really made my day!

By the way, did I mention that I watched "Balls of Fury" on my Birthday? Well, I thought since there wasn't any particular highlight on my 'special' day, i might as well make one. Hence, watching a comedy appealed to me. The movie, as it turned out...was more like a "silly-'b-rated'" comedy, though it was sort of entertaining.

Here's a list of movies that I can't wait to watch:

1) Mr Magorium's Wonder Emporium
2) Enchanted
3) National Treasure 2
4) The Golden Compass

So long for now...

Sad B-day....

2007-11-20T17:42:00.000+08:00

It's been a long time since I last blogged!
Today is my birthday...And it doesn't feel any more special than yesterday. I mean, shouldn't you feel a bit...just a bit special on your birthday?

It doesn't help that I am in a totally different place/ town. My family is not here and I am sort of alone. I don't really know these people here and they don't really know me. So naturally they don't know it's my birthday. But it's sort of weird that the day passes by like every other day. Yeah, of course it is just another day but...

My past birthdays, I was surrounded by people who knew me; my family and friends. They made the day feel a bit different. These people here are nice people but I haven't really known them for long. Not long enough for me to swallow my shy countenance and scream, "It's my BIRTHDAYYYYY!!!!".

Nope, that's not me! Even if I knew them well, I wouldn't shout out the announcement. It's just not in me. Anyways, let's me wallow a bit in self-pity...just for today... and sing myself a Birthday song!

Hey, but then again, I had family members and friends calling and singing birthday wishes on the phone, while others sms-ed their B-day wishes to me! So I guess it isn't so bad after all!

The Mel-Vino Veritas

2007-09-07T11:57:00.000+08:00

Yes, the ever-controversial, award-winning braveheart Mel Gibson visited the Black Fortress for an oh-so-short one hour, yesterday. Like his "in vino veritas" drunken tirade that resulted in the spewing of anti-semitic remarks among other things, the ugly side of the Black Fortress' butterflies surfaced when they got the chance to meet the aging-but-still-good-looking-for-a 51-year-old actor! The butterflies I'm refering to are the chosen beauties (or the silly fillies or the institution's version of dumb blonds). Chosen by the institution's owner and Big Man himself, who encourages minimal attire, maximum make-up and the act of throwing themselves at men.

Honestly! Were it not for the big signboards of the institution's name, one would think it is an institution of debauchery! Well, what else would you call girls who were dressed in their scantily-best and thick make-ups throwing themselves at the star, and later hugging to their hearts the experience of giving the star, tight hugs and teasing (more wolfish and extremely silly) looks. In particular, there was this girl who was supposed to perform a belly dance routine. To put it succintly, she was wearing a black bra-like top and a long skirt with slits on both sides up to her backside. Pretty much throwing herself at Mel. To be fair, there were some decent (actual) beauties with brains. (Of course the numbers are countable... with one hand).

Ok, I confess I was rather excited in meeting Mel Gibson, who was my one-time (long time ago) major crush-idol, but no way am I gonna stoop to such a ridiculous level. And trust me these girls were on major suck-up mode (probably hoping for an instant offer into movie-stardom). Like thaaaat's gonna happen. I mean, come on! Mel Gibson was there for a superficial visit with a superficial air and superficial act of being nice and giving compliments. Like a.n.y... o.t.h.e.r... star who visits; they come, they be nice, they go!

Anyways, the day started off embarassingly so. I got a glimpse of him when he got out of his car before a mob of desperate, screaming students with cameras, camera-phones and digicams swallowed him. After which I could only see occasional balding grey head bobbing up and down. (Do you get the image?)

It was really amazing (not the balding head, mind you...but the incredible mob) because I happened to be standing among the front-side-liners. But I quickly moved away as the crowd swooped in. As much as I wanted to meet Mel Gibson, I certainly did not have a death wish! The thought of being trampled on the platform, in an undignified manner (although sure to get Mel's attention) did NOT appeal to me. Yes, how we look after a traumatic experience is important. (*twinkle*)

Thus, I stayed away...watching his head from afar...far far away in the sidelines...*sigh* (I know I'm getting dramatic here...bear with me as I complete the drama with the Victorian-style almost-swooning sigh...)!

Mel Gibson probably never expected this crazy-frenzy mob because when he got out of the car, he seemed relaxed (just seconds before the pandemonium began). After that, arrangements had to be made for temporary bodyguards and human barriers around him.

What was somewhat embarrasing and disconcerting was the fact that nobody really noticed Bruce Davey, Mel Gibson's long-time friend and producer, whom many did not recognise. He was pretty much overshadowed by Mel's presence. Understandably because Mel used to be hunky actor and now an accomplished actor-turned-director/producer old man, while Bruce is a mediocre-looking behind-the-scene old man. Though honours were given to both, Mel got most of the attention.

Mel's and Bruce's itinerary included a tour around the black fortress (which had to be cut short due to time constraints); Mel giving a talk to the film academy; lunch with the Big Man; and then chao-ing.

It was only towards the end when they were walking towards their cars that I got to snap a picture of Mel (refer to the above pic). I wanted to get his autograph but alas, the crowd was too thick to penetrate and he was heavily guarded by then...it was difficult to even get within 5 feet of him.

Even then, there were a couple of students who were screaming, "I LOVE YOU, MEL!!!!". Right behind me. It was darned embarrassing! God, I felt like turning around and telling them, "Get a grip, girls!". The things people do when they are consumed by the "Mel-wine".

It's like a moment of absolute madness...that changes your whole behaviour... that makes you act irrationally, recklessly and rashly. But people come to their senses after the madness passes. That is the truth of the Mel-wine or rather the meeting-of-stars-wine.

And then eventually they left...it was over! In some ways it was "Phew" and in others it was disappointing. I mean, it's not everyday that you get to see Hollywood stars within a few feet of you. Anyways, the way I see it, "Well...people come, people go! Celebrity or not they are also human, who go through life just like everyone else only perhaps under the scrutiny of the public."

So Long!

Âme perdue

2007-09-04T12:55:00.000+08:00

Lost Soul

I find myself in a confused state of mind. Feeling totally lost. It feels as if my skills and abilities are being sucked out of me slowly and steadily. I’ve lost all motivation to work. Where I'm supposed to gain knowledge and improve my skills, I find that I'm losing them instead. I’m losing what little confidence I’ve had in my abilities. I fear failure and I fear I’m becoming more incapacitated. I’ve lost all purpose of what I’m supposed to be doing. Of what I can do. Of what I should pursue for a better future. I’ve sunk into a black hole and I see no light. I’m drowning... drowning... drowning. How can I save myself?

I feel dazed. Most often I am going through the routines in life like a mechanically operated robot. I don’t really know where I’m going or what I’m doing anymore. I despair. My head feels so heavy... so, so heavy... burdened by thoughts of being a failure. There’re just so many things I’m unsure of...and I keep thinking about what ifs. What if this... what if that... what if... what if...

I’ve been lying low for far too long... I need to get my gumptions up, consequences be damned! Shouldn’t allow people to pull me down. But I’ve been so careful. So careful all these years...that I no longer know who I am or what I’ve become. I'm lost. And I can't cry for help.

My crisis...I don’t know what I want to do. I just don’t know anymore! But, I have an option now... so it’s not so bad... just a little while longer and I’ll get my reprieve. Will it lead to the answer I’m seeking? I don’t know... but I have to give it a shot. It’s only fair.

God, I need a break... I need a quiet place where I can calm myself and simply think of nothing...I need peace.

Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies.

Darned Crossroads!

2007-08-27T13:40:00.000+08:00

Yup! I'm at a crossroad right now. Darn it! But why can't it be a straight road where I don't have to muddle my head with decision-making! (I know some of you are going "Duh, what's life without crossroads". Well, I think God should, ya know, consider that some of us just have decision-making prolems (notice, I didn't say indecisive).

It's such a difficult decision to make! I mean, how do you choose between a donut and a bagel? One minute the donut seems like a really good offer and the next, you think the bagel may be a better bargain! So what do you do! *Sigh*... Err, the donut and bagel... it's metaphorically speaking, of course! Hehehe!

Anyways, what comes to mind next is Robert Frost's:

"Two roads diverged into wood, and I took the one less travelled by and that made all the difference."

Yeah, I tried applying that theory and... well, the road less travelled sounded ideallic... until the thought that I might be crossing paths with hungry beasts and getting attacked, chewed, swallowed and then my bones being spat out... doesn't reeaallly catch my fancy. But still, I guess it's worth giving a try, and then again... *sigh*

By now, you should know... I'm not a risk taker... much prefer playing it safe! But where's the fun in that? Oh God... I'm in a muddle! Darned crossroads! Why CAN'T it be straight! *Sigh*... The fault lies with me... I must have taken a wrong turning somewhere along the line... and there's no u-turn. Darned crossroads!

God, if you're listening... it would be a reeaallly a BIG help if you put up sign boards that says, "This is the right road"... "Don't take that road" or some sign to tell me if I'm on the right track.

Busy & Tiring weekend!

2007-08-13T09:31:00.000+08:00

Lately, I have been feeling very fatigued (i.e weary, tiredness, lack of energy, sleepy, lethargy). On Saturday, I went for a medical examination and got a shock when I found out that I have shrunk (literally!) from 163cm to 160cm in height. Not only that, I have put on about 10kg since I started working at the Black fortress. That just goes to show how conducive the environment is here. I have never put on this much weight in my entire short life!

But seriously, I wonder what's wrong with me... I feel like packing up going home and lying on my bed reading a book. Speaking of books... a colleague of mine just introduced me to the author Susan Elizabeth Phillips. So far, I have read two of her books; Nobody's Baby But Mine and Dream a Little Dream... and am half-way reading This Heart of Mine. And to think I never even knew who she was until last week! Her books are rather addictive once you start on them. I personally like her character meshes and plots (although they are kinda similar in a sense) and of course the sense of humour!

Anyways, back to what I was saying earlier; even though I wake up later on weekends, when I go to work on Monday...I feel like some force has sapped all my energy, leaving behind an empty shell.

But I have to say, this weekend was quite tiresome for me. On Saturday, I went for the medical examination in KL. By the time I done with the X-ray, it was already almost 1pm. Then I took the light-rail system (LRT) train to KLCC. I wanted to get the book entitled "The Measure of a Man" by Sidney Poitier for my mother, for her birthday (on Sunday). Yup, kinda last minute gift-buying...as always. Unfortunately, the book was out of stock in Kinokuniya Bookstore and in the Times Bookstore. That was when I gave in to temptation and bought myself the latter two books by SEP.

By the time I finished running up and down from Kinokuniya (top most floor) to Times (basement-ground floor), it was already 3pm. And I still hadn't bought a gift for my mum. So on impulse and due to time constrains, I popped into The Body Shop. Half-an-hour later, I walked out with my gift - a 60ml White Musk Eau de Parfum and a White Musk body lotion gift set.

Sunday - My mum's birthday. I was the official cook. And with people coming over for her birthday (well, actually just my mum's sisters and family, and my grandmother). That's like an additional 11 people to my household of four. But, it was a record for me...hahaha...a pat in the back. I made 3 side dishes (veges and
salad) plus chicken curry (the dried variety) in within 2 hours all by myself. I'm so proud of me...yehahaha! Ok, people usually make it a lot faster than that but hey, I don't cook often. So I'm gonna pat my back nevertheless.

The day started of with going to the market, then coming home to place the week's vege in the fridge. Then, I was busy with the cooking, cleaning (of course, the cleaning part was with help from my family as well) and serving guests (well, basically my aunts, uncles and cousins). It was finally over at about 6.30pm. Yeah, I was kinda keeping track of the time, of how long before I could join my book and bed! *Phew* What a day! I was glad when I could finally sit down, my heels were practically killing me by then, with all the standing. It felt like heaven when I could finally lie on my bed with my book in hand.

And today, with much, much...mucha pena, I'm back to god-forsaken w.o.r.k! *Sigh*

What type of person do you attract?

2007-08-06T09:29:00.000+08:00

A couple of days back, I stumbled across a personality disorder test website. After concluding the test (which declared that I am not suffering from any severe disorder ...*sigh*... so much for finding some excuse for my quirky habits), I found several other interesting links, one of which was headed: "What type of person do you attract".

So naturally, I was curious! I took the test...although I must say that the questions are more catered for those living in America. But it's nothing you can't answer so why not give it a try, right! Well, here's my result:

What type of person do you attract? Your Result: You attract geeks! Your stunning intellect and love of sci-fi and video games allures the geeks like nothing else. Maybe it is the sparkle in your eye that makes them want to text you, who knows. Geeks make good partners, but tend to be arguementative. If you are a TRUE geek magnet, you will know if that was spelled correctly, and actually care. If it is a bad-boy/bad-girl you are seeking, you are barking up the wrong tree, unless they are just 'bad' behind a PS2 console.
You attract artsy people!
You attract unstable people!
You attract models!
You attract rednecks!
You attract Yuppies!
What type of person do you attract? Quizzes for MySpace

I had a good laugh at that! What's more, my other two options are "artsy people" and "unstable people"! Good God! *Bubbles of laughter*

Anyways, here are several other tests that you can check out:

What mental disorder do you have?
What's your best quality?
What type of partier are you?
Which god or goddess are you like?
How much of a b**ch are you?
How will I die?

Oh, and here's another one I took:

What stereotype are you?

What stereotype do you belong to? Your Result: No stereotype not preppy yet not a complete loser. has good friends and doesn't revolve life around their looks or social status. All around good person. usually liked by everyone
Emo
geek/nerd
Loner
Punk
Jock
Preppy
Gamer
What stereotype do you belong to?

Hmmm...apparently, I don't qualify to fall under any particular stereotype. *twinkle*

Enjoy!

Face reality, people!

2007-07-31T10:44:00.000+08:00

Why am I surrounded by people whose boyfriends or ex-boyfriends are real skunks? And what is it about women who can't be bothered about wrecking relationships so long as they get what they want? Didn't it occur to them that a relationship built on another's pain is bound to end the same way? Or is their selfishness so overpowering that they are incapacitated to do anything about it?

And then there's the women who are affected by the infidelity; the injured party. I've got only one thing to say to you, "Face reality, girls!". They are so ready to anathematize the relationship-wreckers, and yet somehow exonerate their boyfriends' part in the fling. Knowing full well that it takes two to tango.

The worst part is that the boyfriend gets away by spewing a few supposedly passionate love declaration. How easy they have it! I suppose it's all right to forgive the first fling, but of course, with solid reasons. But if the guy is going to continuously repeat his indiscretion, what is the guarantee that he would be faithful once he is married to you? NONE!

The girls are always ready to blame the third party while condoning their boyfriends' behaviour. Giving the excuse that they actually love each other and that they have been through so much together.

Have they ever thought that if they have been through so much together, then there all the more reason for both of them to be faithful to each other??? Sometimes I think love is just one step from stupidity. Don't tell me love is blind and that only someone who's been love will know it. No matter how much you love someone, there's always a small, rational and practical part of you that keeps you on the brink of reality. It's just that some people choose to ignore it, blinded by their fiery affection.

Have some self-respect and dignity. Don't sell yourself short for a passion that may be one-sided; or even if its reciprocated, there should be a level of commitment to each other. Without it, there no trust. And without trust, there's no relationship. It works both ways! If a guy is really serious about you, then he should be sensitive to what bothers you. And what bothers you is his relationship with another woman, then he should be prepared to avoid any unwarranted circumstances. Not by flaunting it.

No matter how much you love a guy, you should be able to let them go. There is no use in holding on to someone who doesn't want to stay. Don't kid yourself by his seemingly fervent declaration that "You're the one". If you really are the one, he wouldn't have hurt you in the first place.

And to all relationship-wreckers out there, you should be ashamed of yourself! Whether for money or for love, you should never, never wreck another woman's life. Being selfish and greedy will not pay in the end. The same thing can and probably will happen to you. For a guy who leaves his current girl for you, he won't hesitate to jump when someone else comes along.

Don't use or be used!

ASS-U-ME

2007-07-28T11:50:00.000+08:00

Someone once told me a long, long time ago that to assume is to just make an ass out of u and me. An equation that goes like this:

assume = ass + u + me

I try to keep this in mind whenever the situation arises. But I am amazed that knowing this doesn't stop people from making assumptions, which more often that not results in the most erroneous conclusions.

Sad to say, it is the people around me who make these assumptions. Just because I am quiet and keep to myself, people immediately assume that I do not know or am ignorant on the topic at hand. And I am secretly amused by the totally wrong conclusions that they draw about me.

They are unwilling to give these assumptions the benefit of doubt it deserves. Thereby drawing the conclusion that they are so doggedly sure is true! And I feel reluctant to correct their misconception simply because I believe it would dissappoint them. Maybe I should correct them so that they do not look down on me, but somehow over time, I have taken on the devil-may-care attitude to their ignorant assumptions.

Harry Potter mania...

2007-07-21T08:52:00.000+08:00

I was sooooo tempted. So tempted. I was thhhiiiiiss "| |" close to joining other Potter maniacs at KLCC in the wee hours of the morning. Kinokuniya Bookstore would have opened at 5.30am to release the 7th book: "Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows". And they were going to give out 3 exclusive autographed book and 10 (without autograph) books away for free, nevertheless! I'll bet some maniacs were there by 3am or maybe the night before!

Darn it! I WANT the book! I waaannnntttt itttt!!! I want! I want! I want! Hmmm, okay. I have thus vented out my WANT! Now, I can get on with life. Of course,...*sigh*...it would be much better if I had a copy of the book! But Gambateyoh! I shall wait until the price falls from its ridiculous pedestal.

I wonder how thick it would be this time. Thicker than before? Then I can decide on whether to buy hardcover or paperback. Like the multitudes of Potter fans, I wonder how it all ends. Who dies? Is it Harry? Ron? Hermione?

I knowww... I am bordering on obsession for a mere book meant (as most adults believe) for children. But who cares! It is a fuel to the imaginative minds out there. It is entertainting and a fantasy that you want to belong to even as a means of escapism. As Rufus Wainwright said: "Let the little fairy in you fly”. Ok, I know his name is Rufus - not a name you'd want to name your son - but still, think about what he said. By the way, he is a Canadian singer-songwriter from a family of singer-songwriters.

Most adults have lost their ideals in joining many others on a hollow search for material wealth; title and power. They have lost the precious childlike quality, the only link that keeps them in touch with all things pure like trust, affection, love, compassion, humanity... untainted by manipulations and evil designs. Adults should not be embarassed to show that they still have that unique side in them. Well, that's that! And each to his or her own ideals, I guess. Whom am I to dictate what makes a human.

*Sigh*... Anyways, I did wonder if I could bribe my sister into queing up at KLCC to get the book for me, while I get my sleep before going off to work. Lol!... Just thought to give the idea a try! Didn't work though. Well, so long, Harry Potter! I'll read you soon, hopefully!

I wonder... I wonder if anyone I know have bought the book already? Hmmm, maybe I could borrow from them for the time being. I wonder, I wonder...

Portrait of Lady Di

2007-07-20T11:08:00.000+08:00

I've been thinking about art. Yes, to be more specific... I want to sketch a portrait of Lady Diana. Okay, it's not like I'm the oh-so-professional portrait artist or something, but if I put mind to it, I can create a pretty decent portrait. Note, I said decent not good. Of course, even that depends on whether I find the light is right, the mood is right, the right utensils, an abundance of patience, and of course the major thing: TIME!

It has been a long time since I drew any portrait...I can't even remember the last time. So, there goes more time on catching up on my artistic touch. (Hmmm, I have an artistic touch???Hah! Just humour me for a bit, alright). I still have some of my old paintings and drawing and portraits...nothing great but it's passable.

There's something about sketching, drawing, painting or simply any form of ART that's really, really soothing for me. It's one of those precious moments where you just become so involved and absorbed in something, that it's like entering a totally different universe. If you are the artistically inclined, I would recommend it as a stress-release therapy. Even if you aren't, I would still recommend it. When you capture your subject under the right light...it gives you a sense of pleasure of being able to create something so, so beautiful and serene.

But to really spend time on art, there are sacrifices to be made. Honestly, I don't think shutting people out, drowning their voices or simply ignoring the bothersome creatures, a sacrifice. It's a blessing in disguise. There's nothing to spoil your mood like humans.

Although portraits are challenging, personally, I prefer scenery and object painting, though I'm just better at sketches. Why? Well, that's usually when my patience run out! Therefore, my portraits remain unpainted. Because I know, when I push myself to continue...it usually lead to destruction. More specifically, the destruction of the portrait! Sad ain't it!

God gave me loads and loads of patience. But I used it up on all the people around me...so there's not much left when I really need it for something more worthwhile and meaningful! Sigh!!!

By now, I'm sure I've described myself as an antisocial homo sapien. So there! That's just me! Anyways, here are a few pictures of Lady Di that inspires me:

Tagged...again!

2007-07-06T17:25:00.000+08:00

I've been tagged by the delightfully loco woman dieselfire because "it's fun and you need it". I suppose it wouldn't hurt to indulge in the cyber-chain tag game.

But first, here are the guidelines:

• Each player must post these rules first.
• Each player starts with eight random facts/habits about themselves.
• People who are tagged need to write their own blog about their eight things and post these rules.
• At the end of your blog, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names.
• Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog.

So...8 little known facts about the scribbler, eh? Well, here it is (in no particular order):

1) I'm actually kind of obsessive-compulsive... I feel this great urge to straighten things that seem askew or not in its proper place or order. But I am trying to break free of it.

2) I can't abide by long hours of shopping for clothes but don't see the time passing when I'm in a bookstore.

3) I get real cranky, short-fused and easily irritable when I have not had my food. A side of me that no friends have yet to see.

4) I am bloody indecisive when I am shopping with people (family, friend...just anybody) but when I'm alone it is so easy-peazy for me.

5) I start off with high level of patience with everyone I meet. Make that very high! Because I know once they breach the limit, I'll be very short-fused with them and won't tolerate even a tiny mistake on their part at all.

6) I am very vengeful and I have a sharp tongue. I can really hurt people with my words...if I wanted too. And my words will definitely hit the mark… no doubt about that. Which is one of the reasons why I don't like to talk much, especially when I am angry to a boiling point.

7) Ok, for the past few years I have been cutting my hair by myself. Well, actually, I go to a hair salon but I am always not satisfied with the results (which is why I try different salons every time but still...). So usually when I come home, I do a little trimming by myself.

8) I hate putting on make-up because it's time consuming and I feel it has a slow and steady way of spoiling your skin. I use it only when absolutely necessary.

9) Apart from my father, brother and other male relatives, I don't really keep close contact or friendship with boys or men (excluding children). Which is why, most of the time I maintain a very casual-bordering-on-awkward friendship based relationship with those nice guys. Why? Not sure, really but could be because when I was younger, I used to have boys teasing and trying to tackling me... It kinda scared me, I don't know why. After that, I started putting on weight just to put them off. Stupid, huh?

10) Ok...before I was born, the doctor predicted I was 99% boy. 99% because there was this small thing that stood out...it was my toe!!! LOL! And unlike most babies who were born with their head out first, I was born sitting down, with my legs out first. This probably explains why gadgets fascinate me more than cosmetics and dresses ever will. And as my brother pointed out, I tend to pick "guys' bags", "guys' pants" and "guy's amulet/ chain-necklace". *Sigh*... At least my sexual orientation is straight, uh…normal. No offence intended to any gays and lesbians out there.

Now, for the next part...tagging others. Don't know whom I should tag at the moment...Maybe later!

Stuck in a mud pool the size of Lake Taupo!

2007-07-02T09:54:00.000+08:00

This morning when I woke up from bed, I was assailed by this powerful feeling that it's high time I got out of the black den. I was practically dragging my feet to get here! Okay...i drag my feet everyday, but today, it was extra, extra draggy feet and all.

I knew then that there's no way my career can grow despite the many reviews that this is a great place for career growth. Great place, my foot! That probably applies to those who belong in this place. All I see is that every other person (who belongs - belong with a capital B - to this cursed place) here seem to be moving forward...except for me.

It's like I'm stuck in this stagnant pool of mud with no way out! A pool the size of Lake Taupo, at that. Every step I take in every direction only seem to pull me towards the deeper end of the mud. If I don't hightail my way out of the mud soon, I might just get sucked into the whirlpool of sticky, stinking, soiled, slave-driving, sorry state of a work-place that I call office.

Okay, I am usually a very calm and collected person. Never mind that sometimes I carry a hatchet and hack everyone who crosses me...in my mind, of course. But this morning, I woke up feeling really, really antagonistic. And I don't like it! This place is changing me, poisoning my thoughts, criplling my abilities, stagnating my brain waves, influencing me...Oh god! I'm becoming one of those whinning zombies working at the black den!!! OK,Ok,ok...I cool, I'm calm...I shall not give in to this dramatic urge.

Think positive, think positive, think positive! I shall wield my oh-so-powerful shield and sword, and march to work with my defenses up against the dark fortress. Nothing can penetrate my shield! If that doesn't work, I can always get a nuclear bomb and just blast this god-forsaken place!...Errr...nope, that's the dark forces trying to get the terrorist in me to speak up...NEVER!!! I shall succeed on my own! Hmmm...I need a plan (*scratch beardless chin*)(*thoughtful*).

To be continued...

This and that...

2007-06-26T13:25:00.000+08:00

Perceptions...whose?

As I sat at the cafeteria grounds at the Black den today, I listened to people talking and I realized something. I tuned out of conversations and sounds that surrounded me to think outside myself. To see outside myself.

And I saw...I saw people who see what they want to see. People who hear what they want to hear. They seem to reject the notion of being in another person's shoe. They are all in a world of their own...in their perception of reality. They fail to perceive that sometimes people don't always think the same way as they do. Different individuals think differently but not necessarily in a bad sense!

Just because they don't share your opinions, does not mean that they are stupid or a lesser intellectual. You have to accept people for who they are, faults and all. Do not let pride overwhelm your senses. Most people miss out on important things by letting pride get in the way.

It's not just pride. It might also be the animosity that you might feel towards a certain individual or individuals. Just because you are angry or having a hostile relationship with someone...it's not an excuse to overlook their ability or talents or ideas.

Most people don't see the whole picture. And that's the problem. Even if they do, they see it through their own eyes and not objectively. They bring along their bias and colour the situation as they see fit. And, the hell-of-it is that they don't seem to realize it! Or maybe...they don't want to!

And, as I sat at the cafeteria, listening to all the sounds around me...I thought...Are all people like this. Do they really see outside the box or is that just a context applied within a small sphere? No matter how open-minded they are or seem to be, they are yet still confined by their own, self-revolving, narrow perceptions... hidden beneath a thin layer of superficial conversation topics and world views.

And, I ask myself...Am I like that? Will I be one of them? Am I already one of them? I dont' want to be...No, I don't!

***

Not all taxi drivers are bad after all!

There are good people out there. More accurately, good cab drivers! Yesterday was a good example. I was stranded at the Black den as I came out at about 8pm to look for the public bus. There were none and according to the security guards, they haven't seen one in over two hours!

I was doomed. There was no other way for me to get my express bus station. Fortunately for me, there was one taxi. But having had the kind of experience with 'cut-throat' taxi fares, I was reluctant. As I waited at the security room, there was this old uncle who was talking about the sorry state of bus services here. (I couldn't agree more!). Anyways, he offered to drop me off at the station at a reasonable amount of "RM 2 or 3", he said. Needless to say, I was so happy. (That's how desperate I was...and I know real well about the transportation system here!)

I agreed and got on the taxi. The drive was about 5 - 10 minutes. But throughout the journey, he was busy talking about the kinds of jobs that is best for girls. And then, he was talking about his daughters and what jobs they have. Well, there I was tuning in an out of his conversation, nodding and saying "hmmm" at appropriate pauses and after every sentence. When we reached the bus station, I got out and handed the money to him. But he didn't accept it!!!

I was like (*eye-balls out*)"Really!". But of course, i didn't say that out loud. I just smiled and thanked him "very much". And he drove off. Hmmm...maybe, i should have been more attentive to what he was talking, instead of acting like an electronic-operated puppet. He was a nice guy...Well, I guess not all cab driver are money-minded, annoying homo sapiens...after all!!!.

Money, money, money!

2007-06-22T10:27:00.000+08:00

I want money! I need money! I certainly don't love money but it sure does make life a darn bit more convenient! Wouldn't you say?

Why do I want and need money? Well, so that I could take a year's sabbatical, from everything and everyone around me. Just so that I could travel around the world with my camera. Just me, myself and I! (Oh, what a heavenly thought!*dreamy*)

Well, I'll give half to my parents so that they can do whatever they want with it. And...so that they won't bother me during my sabbatical.

I'm really not asking much...just a bag full. A 20" x 30" bag with stacks of US1000 currencies in it. That's really not too much when there are people around the world, who spend $10,000 per day, just on shopping!

At times like these, I really, really blame Eve for her stupidity! She could have had everything for free! Now, all the human successors have to pay for her folly! Imagine having everything you want, just handed down to you...no need for money at all! Urgghhh, Eve! Next time, THINK before you act!*long, frustrated sigh* I forget...there's no next time, is there!

You know, I wouldn't mind if money grows on trees! I don't think anyone else would mind either. So, God, if you're listening...do take heed. All you have to say is: "Hundreds of money trees coming up!". Oh, yeah! That would be ideal. (Excuse me, while I make a visit to my dreamland).

Fascination with Scotland

2007-06-21T11:14:00.000+08:00

For the past two days, I've been in and out of fantasy land. (In my mind, of course) It's not that I'm so free to be doing that. (Well, not free but sort of free, if that makes any sense!)...For some reason, this time I had the Scottish highlands as my backdrop.

The more I think about it, the more I feel like taking the next plane straight to Scotland. Alas, if only that was possible! It's not like I have a lot of money to be travelling wherever I want, anyways! But just to share this fascination of mine, here's a glimpse of Scotland's landscape:

Yes, all my fantasies are set near the water. Be it near the lakes, seaside, beaches, and waterfalls. I just gravitate to the place where there is a vast expanse of water. I don't know why but I just do love the sea best. Oh...and castles...Yup, I'm into fairy tales stuff. Castles...mysterious, romantic...especially the ones with secret tunnels and tall towers...near the sea.

My dream house is set on a cliff overlooking the ocean. Evening strolls on the beach...Enjoying the sea breeze...Watching the sunrise and sunset...ALL part of my fantasy. Maybe one day...just maybe...

What's wrong with me?

2007-06-15T11:15:00.000+08:00

What's wrong with me, pray tell, what's wrong with me?

I'm feeling useless and unproductive, even when I am given an assignment to do. Everyday, I seem to be retreating into a state of a vacant mind. I am unconcerned about learning basic things like the current affairs in the country, road directions, names of common vegetables and dishes. I seem to have no interest, no interest at all in anything.

I've somehow lost my aim here at the black den. What am I doing here?

Tagged!

2007-06-12T12:02:00.000+08:00

Okay, actually I've been tagged before by some of my friends but I'm ashamed to say that I had no idea what to do about it. (I feel so stupid now)...Anyways, I kinda assumed that there would be a link if I'm supposed to do something, ya know!

Anyways, I just found that all I had to do was "cut and paste" and fill it with my own answers. Duh...I'm so, so, so...ulu...urgghh!!! Just recently I got tagged by dieselfire, so here goes...

4 Jobs I've had in my life
1. Doing laundry (at home)
2. Writing nonsense that's sometimes makes sense in a nonsensical way
3. Reading not so intelligent work that's supposed to be intelligent
4. Being a slave for arrogant, egocentric, think-they're-always-right, slave-driving maniacs (yes, more than one in my short work experience!)

4 Movies I can watch over and over again
1. A Hazard of Hearts
2. Robin Hood and the Men in Tights
3. Shah Rukh Khan films
4. Princess Bride

4 Places I've been on Vacation (sigh, i've never been out of m'sia)
1. Awana Kijal, Terengganu
2. Pulay Perhentian - Redang (My trip included both islands)
3. Pulau Tioman
4. Near Thai border (so sad, that's the further's I've been from M'sia)

4 Of my Favorite Dishes
1. Spicy Thai Tom Yam!
2. Chicken(mostly all chicken dishes, preferably peppered and spicy)
3. Puri (North Indian dish)
4. Does dessert count? (Creamy, nutty, chocolaty, with vanilla ice cream etc, etc)Yum!

4 Places I would like to Visit
1. Ireland/ Scottish Highlands
2. Italy
3. Seychelles
4. Atlantis (yup, the one that's supposed to have been buried under the sea)

4 Most overused Words
1. You monkey!
2. My Gosh/ God
3. Oh!Hmmm...
4. I don't know. (Seriously! *grin*)

4 TV Shows I love to Watch
1. CSI (LV, Miami, NY)
2. My Family (BBC)- (I just love their sarcastic humour)
3. Supernatural (of course)
4. House (Sarcastic humour at its best)

4 Bloggers I am Tagging
1. Cat
2. Emily
3. Kimmik
4. Ernie

Global Indian Shopping Fest 2007

2007-06-11T09:46:00.000+08:00

Last saturday after work, I dropped by Mid Valley for the Global Indian Shopping Fest. Last year, it received a good reviews on the goods that were sold. So i decided to check it out this year. I was to meet my mom and sister there. Anyways, i was there at about 4pm. It was at the third flr...the exhibition centre.

It was so terribly crowded. I HATE crowd (or crowded places etc). I feel as if I'm gonna drown or swallowed, or more likely stepped on, stomped on, pushed about etc etc etc.We started going from booth to booth, looking at the clothings, costume jewelry and various items that were on sale. But sad to say, it was a rather dissappointing visit. The items were not that great and more expensive than that of the previous years. It was not worth it! Anyways, i just bought some bangles (and that was after my mom nagging to buy it for a wedding that's coming up on Sunday).

The only two consolation was probably (for me...the glorious Indian sweets), and the entertainment sequence that they had on for the day. The singers were not bad and the comedy acts were actually funny.

By the time we were done browsing all the booths and buying a couple of things, it was already 7.30pm. So we decided to have dinner before going home. We really liked the Book Cafe in MPH (when we went there previously). For bookies like me, that is the ideal place. So we decided to have our dinner there again. But the plus point about the Book Cafe is that the food is REALLY good. It is MOST definitely better than what we get here at the Black den. In fact, i think it could be as good as Starbucks, only without the branding. I would like to think of it as the unspoiled or unexploited (yet) cafe.

We got home about 9.30pm. I was tired (or rather my heels) because i did quite a bit of walking...not just in Mid Valley but also on the way there and during the way back home.

Humour: Double entendre

2007-06-09T08:50:00.000+08:00

One of the best types of humour is the double entendre. So enjoy!

Two cows are standing next to each other in a field.
Daisy says to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning."
"I don't believe you," says Dolly.
"It's true! No bull!" exclaims Daisy.

A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything".

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

An invisible man marries an invisible women. Their children were nothing to look at either.

A dyslexic walks into a bra...

Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says, "Dam!"

And finally...

Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.

Tarot, ESP and all things ARCANE!

2007-06-08T15:16:00.000+08:00

I've always had an unusual interest in things related to the mystic or the supernatural. Unusual in that I dwell on it more enthusiastically compared to others. Most people are only temporarily fascinated by this topic. But for me, I've been into it since young when I first learned about it, since...i can't even remember when!

There have been times when i've had sudden intuition or strong instinct on certain things, it has proven to be true. Uncannily so, that sometimes it gives me goosebumps. But somehow it is beyond my control. Most of the times, though, i tend to ignore the less distinctive intuitions, writing them off as inconsequential thoughts that often crowd my mind. Only to realise them later. (Don't we all sometimes?!)

Anyways, I came across a website the other day, where you can get free online Tarot Reading, find out how strong is your ESP by taking the Extrasensory Perception Test and discover more about your love life through the Love Tarot Reading. You can also check out your Ascendant (Rising sign), Moon sign, Biological rhythm, and Numerology at the Realms of the Arcane website.

Enjoy checking these links out. Even if you don't believe, do it for the FUN of it!

Feeling lost?

2007-06-07T09:02:00.001+08:00

Lost

Lost in a world, that scares me to death,
Lost in a crowd, I'm losing my breath.
Lost as a boy, lost as a man,
I need to grow up, don't think I can.

Lost as a person, can't find my way.
Lost in life, every day.
Lost in worry, who am I?
All my life, I've lived a lie.

Lost to kindness, lost to love,
Lost in a sky, like a new-born dove.
Lost in thought, which I shouldn't do,
It winds me up, I can’t get through.

Lost to comfort, all kind words,
Lost to advice, it isn't heard.
Lost to those who really care,
All these people, always there.

Lost in me, I need a break,
Lost in wonder, which road to take?
Lost in a place I don't know well,
Where are you now? There's no one to tell.

Lost here, all alone,
Lost apart from the mobile phone.
Lost still, there are no calls.
I'm struggling alone, to break these walls.

Lost in mind, lost in soul,
Lost memories, they're just a hole.
Lost family, lost mate,
Gone now, yet I'm full of hate.

Lost in a straight world, and I am gay,
Lost now, for what to say,
Lost in boredom, think I'll leave.
There's a lot in life I need to achieve.

~ Dan Brown ~

Sometimes I feel the way the poet feels...Okay, maybe not all of it, especially not the being gay part. But suffice to say most of it.

It is so elegant yet so sad. And you can feel the melancholic depression, portrayed in the poem.

Tattoo thoughts...

2007-05-30T16:53:00.000+08:00

I've been entertaining thoughts of getting a tattoo recently. Again. The last time was a few months ago; I think maybe nov, dec and jan. It was actually a colleague who got me interested when she showed me her new tattoo. We had planned to get one together but the plan just never took off.

Anyway, what triggered my latest mania? Hmmm...I'm not quite sure... Oh yeah, the other day, I was at Mid Valley and I saw someone who had a fresh tattoo on his arm! Yup, i think it was that, which triggered my sudden interest. An interest short of an obsession, i must say! I am thinking of getting either a moon angel with an inscription that says: love, peace and joy in sanskrit or two dolphins around the yin and yang symbol

I'm still trying to see the pros and cons of getting the tattoo:

PRO: It looks good
CON: It becomes not so nice when you're older

PRO: It's pretty cool
CON: It may stretch and sag later on

PRO: It's the IN thing now
CON: May not be the in thing when you're an old crone

PRO: It contains meaningful message
CON: The needle may be infected...(god, what an awful thought!)

PRO: You can show off to friends
CON: If it turns out ugly, you'll have to live with it forever!

PRO: But, it looks goooood!
CON: Is that the only argument you can make?

PRO: It's pretty?
CON: I give up! You're delusional, obsessive and compulsive. And...You're not
thinking rationally.

PRO: I am too! Thinking rationally, that is.
CON: Yeah? Why do you want a tattoo?

PRO: (uncertain)...It looks good?
CON: I rest my case.

Hmmm...I think I'll just...see where the wind takes me. If I am meant to have a tattoo, the wind will take me there. As it always has.

Here are some tattoo ideas:

Who I Am - Part 1

2007-05-26T11:00:00.000+08:00

I AM:
Just another soul fleeting on earth
Aiming for the light at the end of the tunnel
Still holding on to dreams that may never be
Yet hoping they will come true never-endingly

A mass of emotions warring for release
Nary a moment not seeking for peace
Taciturn and wary of strangers and friends
Hiding behind a mask of indifference

Realising too late of what may have been,
I am who I am but just another soul fleeting on earth
~Jay Ann~

Value of a smile, laughter

2007-05-24T09:25:00.000+08:00

"Laugh when trouble comes your way. Nothing conquers calamity better than that." -Kural 621

People often underestimate the value of a smile, laughter. But somehow at the back of my mind, my conscience knows its healing powers, the strength that laughter lends when you're down, and how a smile could just make your day!

Here's something I found from an article by Chuck Gallozzi:

Benefits of Laughter

1. When you make fun of yourself, you disempower those who would make fun of you and disarm possible confrontations.

2. Laughter dissolves tension, stress, anxiety, irritation, anger, grief, and depression. Like crying, laughter lowers inhibitions, allowing the release of pent-up emotions. After a hearty bout of laughter, you will experience a sense of well-being. Simply put, he who laughs, lasts. After all, if you can laugh at it, you can live with it. Remember, a person without a sense of humor is like a car without shock absorbers.

3. Medical researches have found that laughter boosts the immune system. The study of how behavior and the brain affect the immune system is called psychoneuroimmunology. Though still in its infancy, this science is rapidly gaining much attention as mankind strives to understand the mind-body relationship.

4. Laughter reduces pain by releasing endorphins that are more potent than equivalent amounts of morphine.

5. Humor helps integrate both hemispheres of our brain, for the left hemisphere is used to decipher the verbal content of a joke while the right hemisphere interprets whether it is funny or not.

6. Laughter adds spice to life; it is to life what salt is to a hard-boiled egg.

7. Develop your sense of humor and you will find you are more productive, a better communicator, and a superior team player.

8. Everyone loves someone who can make them laugh. The more you share your sense of humor, the more friends you will have.

9. Humor brings the balance we need to get through the turbulence of life comfortably.

10. Laughter is even equivalent to a small amount of exercise. It massages all the organs of the body, according to Dr. James Walsh.

11. A sense of humor can help you accept the inevitable, rise to any challenge, handle the unexpected with ease, and come out of any difficulty smiling.

People whom I meet regularly often wonder why I'm always smiling. Honestly? I don't think I smile enough or laugh enough. And in this day and time, not many people do either. I like to smile and laugh at the most silliest and senseless things...but some people find me queer because of that.

For me...Smiling is my armour. Smiling hides my sadness. Smiling overcomes my embarrassment. Smiling helps me cope with life's uncertainties. Sometimes when you are in a rage, and something really funny happens that makes you want to smile or laugh, you'll discover that you anger has vanished. That's the kind of power a smile, laughter has. It instantaneous and highly effective.

Yet, smiling is subjective. It depends on whether or not you let it heal you. All you have to do is allow it to happen! Always keep an open mind, open heart and the willingness to stretch that facial muscle of yours and indulge in a hearty laughter. Laughter is infectious, after all!

"If we couldn't laugh, we would all go insane." - Jimmy Buffett

Cheating consequence!

2007-05-17T14:00:00.000+08:00

I keep a collection of jokes and other interesting written materials that I've come across over the years from various sources; books, magazines, the net and others. The collection of jokes ranges from randy jokes to sarcastic humour to plain cheekiness. Well, here's one:

A lady walks into a drug store and tells the pharmacist that she needs cyanide.

The pharmacist said, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?" The lady then explained that she needed it to poison her husband.

The pharmacist's eyes got big, and he said, "Lord have mercy, I can't give you cyanide to kill your husband! That's against the law! I'll lose my license, they'll throw both of us in jail and all kinds of bad things will happen! NO! Absolutely not-- NO, you can NOT have any cyanide!"

The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife.

The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "Well now, you didn't tell me you had a *prescription* ..."

.......grin-grin.......

Zodiac

2007-05-14T09:33:00.000+08:00

These links give a pretty accurate reading on your zodiac...Enjoy!

The Zodiac is made up of 12 different sun signs. Your date of birth determines which one you are. Click your sign below for complete detailed information on your sign:

Aries - Mar 21 - Apr 20

Taurus - Apr 21 - May 21

Gemini - May 22 - June 21

Cancer - June 22 - July 22

Leo - July 23 -Augt 23

Virgo - Augt 22 - Sept 22

Libra - Sept 24 - Oct 23

Scorpio - Oct 24 - Nov 22

Sagittarius - Nov 23 - Dec 21

Capricorn - Dec 22 - Jan 20

Aquarius - Jan 21 - Feb 19

Pisces - Feb 20- Mar 20

Frustations Appeased

2007-05-12T09:14:00.000+08:00

Found this somewhere, somtime ago...(sometimes it's just so tempting to say some of these to certain people). But look at the bright side, you can always say it in your mind! ;-D

1) Obviously you’re unable to assimilate my stimulating concepts into your blighted and simplistic world-view.

2) I don’t know what your problem is, but I’ll bet it’s hard to pronounce.

3) Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.

4) I can see your point but I still think you’re full of it.

5) I like you. You remind me when I was young and stupid.

6) What am I? Flypaper for freaks!

7) I’m not being rude. You’re just insignificant.

8) I’ll give you a nice, shiny quarter if you’ll go away.

9) I’m already visualising the duct tape over your mouth.

10) I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.

11) It’s a thankless job, but I’ve got a lot of karma to burn off.

12) Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.

13) How about never? Is never good for you?

14) I’m really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.

15) You sound reasonable. It must be time to up my medication.

16) You’re just jealous because the little voices talk to ME.

17) I’ll try being nicer if you’ll try being smarter.

18) I’m out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message…

19) I don’t work here. I’m a consultant.

20) Who me? I just wander from room to room.

*grins*

Era of Madness...

2007-05-10T11:40:00.000+08:00

This is my letter to all those people who are married to their jobs:

Dear World,

Why are people so caught up in their careers in this era? Why is it that they are willing to slave away hour(s) after hour(s) in their office? What do they wish to gain? Material wealth? Recognition? Accumulating wealth for children/ family, whom they have no time to spend with? What IS IT????

I see people everyday and meet people everywhere i go...and most of them have one thing in common: Slaving over work until the wee hours. They are so committed, it would seem that work IS their life. What about the more important things in life? The REAL things. Things that matter! I can think of only one MOST important thing in a person's life: FAMILY! Career comes later...it is secondary, it is essential but not absolute. We work to live not live to work! But somehow, I feel that people are living up to the latter decree rather than the former.

They don't seem to realise that at the end of the day...it's family that counts. There are people out there who slog all their lives for their boss' company only to wake up and find themselves kicked out. Then there are bosses who enslave others for their own prosperity with little regard that those 'slaves' are human too. There are also those bosses and employees alike, who are totally buried in their jobs that they expect no less from others. These are the ones who will never realise the value of family and love until the last moment...when it is all just too late.

Somehow people are under a delusion that material wealth will ensure the happiness of their family. Yeah, sure money can buy a lot of things...make that a WHOLE lot of things BUT still it cannot buy what really matters. And if you don't know what really matters then...(I weep for you).

I see people shackled to their job and it scares me to think that one day maybe i'll be among them. Perhaps because I'm at the adolescent stage in the working world, that i can 'see' more clearly what others do not see before them. They are too steeped in this, this fever...or plague...or disease that seems to have made them prisoners. Prisoners who are totally unaware of their predicament and captor. It is all just so sad.

Have you really thought what happens when you finally have all the money and recognition that you've always coveted but no one to share it with. No one knows what's gonna happen tomorrow. Your family and everyone you've cared for and loved can all disappear in the blink of an eye. Think about it! The question is: IS IT ALL WORTH IT? Is it worth it when you've lost your family? Is it worth it to have lost the chance to be a part of your children's childhood? Is it worth it to have lost the chance to spend quality time with your parents in their old age and family? Is it worth it when your children don't know you well enough to love you?

Someone once told me that he had to bribe his children with money and chocolates just to hear them say, "I love you, dad". He was always too busy going on overseas trips and barely sees his children. Sad to say, even now he barely has the time to spend with his children. And now, they have all grown up, he still has to bribe them.

It wouldn't be long before they 'bribe' the old folks home to look after you. It wouldn't be long before you never see your parents again. It wouldn't be long before your wife and children give up on you. And it wouldn't take long for the wealth that you've spent years collecting deplete before your eyes.

Finally, I see you standing alone, lonely and disheartened, regret and defeat etched on your face. And probably this is only the beginning of a lonely, sorrowful life into your final years on earth.

You can change this ending because it's all in your hands! Change it before it's too late.

Weeping Heart

Sunset & Sea

2007-05-09T16:55:00.000+08:00

Sunset and Sea...a combination that i find simply irresistible! The sea has a strange pull (for me at least). Somehow I find the large column of water very...calming, soothing and i could just sit at the beach...forever.

I took these pictures at a beach (in Sepang) right here in Malaysia:

At a different angle (notice the small boat right under the sun:

As the sun disappears behind the clouds and beyond...

These pictures manage to capture the fading sun but not the ambience, not the feeling you get when you're right there staring the sun in the eye (i know it's not good for our eyes *tongue out*, *smile*). I closed my eyes and felt the fading sun as well as the cool, salty breeze on my face and the wind whispering in my ears, when i stood at the beach that day.

Brangelina...

2007-05-08T09:33:00.000+08:00

I found this on YouTube when i was looking for Bryan Adams' songs (i loovvve his voice btw)...

I thought they looked good together, but then again i also thought Reese Witherspoon-Ryan Phillippe looked like an ideal couple as did bruce-demi, tom-nicole, and meg-dennis. Hopefully, their union lasts longer than the 7-13 years marriage that the ones i mentioned had. Of course, 7-10 years of marriage is considerably pretty long in the Hollywood standards. Nevertheless having an ideal opinion that marriages should last forever, makes me hope that "Brangelina" will stick it through.

As I listened to Bryan Adams' deep, gorgeous (if that's the right word to describe his voice - the only other word i can think of is sexy) voice, i was watching the video. It was a collage of brangelina pictures...some were of them looking at each other, and others were of brad looking at jolie or jolie-looking at brad when the other isn't paying attention. I thought it was kind of sweet and sooo awwwwww! But, then again what do I know! People fall in and out of love at the drop of a hat these days. It was probably because the Bryan Adams' song.

"Have You Ever Loved A Woman" by Bryan Adams. Sung for the movie "Don Juan DeMarco". If ever there was a song as deeply sensual...with words designed to woo and seduce women...this is IT!. But that's just MY opinion! Enjoy listening to it.

Cat-Attacked!

2007-05-04T10:50:00.000+08:00

I was involved in a catfight on Wednesday. Yup, in a catfight...Only, when I say catfight, I mean it literally!

There I was taking my little doggie for his ritual walk around the apartment compound and suddenly I heard this hissing-screech behind me. Just as I turned I saw a bob-cat launch itself at Ossie, trying to claw at him.

As I was holding Ossie on a leash, he couldn't really run far. The only option (apparently my dog thought so) was to circle my feet. Get the image of me caught between a frantic dog and the cat-from-hell. I tried to shoo the cat away and simultaneously tried to separate my little doggie away from the sharp claws of the vicious-mad cat by picking him up.

The end results when I finally managed to lift up my little doggie:

1) Scratches on both MY legs.
2) A hysterical dog in my arms.
3) A still screeching cat within two feet from me.

Thankfully, the cat retreated and I walked away with my little doggie. Oscar's thick coat of fur must have protected him from the scratches because HE didn't seem to worse for wear. In fact, when we got home, he was very nonchalant and cool. Darn it! But it was HIM the cat attacked and ME who got the worst hit. *miffed*

Caption: My pet rascal Oscar, always under the delusion that he is one macho dog.

And people THINK taking a pet for a walk was harmless and no trouble. Well think again!

Delightful words!

2007-05-03T10:35:00.000+08:00

I've always been amazed by adopted words. The delightful thing about such words is the humour in saying them (especially when pronounced deliberately wrong) or the association with some similar phonetics and images. The following ones are quite funny when seen under the 'humourous' light:

hors d'oevre ("or duhrv"), which means delicacy - horse devoured.

annus mirabilis ("anus muhrabuhlis"), which means a wonderful year - anal ikan bilis??

coup de grace ("koo de grahss"), which means finishing blow - chickens in disgrace?

cri de coeur ("kree' de kur"), which means heartfelt appeal - can i answer that with cuckoo-raa-koo?

in loco parentis ("in loh'koh pa-rentiss"), which means in the place of a parent - yup, them craaazzy parents!

deus ex machina ("day'us ex mahkuh-nuh"), which means a contrived device to resolve a situation - sound more like 'the sex machine'? Say it slowly and you'll see what i mean.

doppelganger ("doppul-gang-ur"), which means a ghostly double of a living person - dope-algae angel...whatever does that mean?

feinschmecker ("fine-sh-meker), which means gourmet - a fine schmuck!

gourmet ("gur-me"), which means gastronome - somehow it always sounds like...door mat!

mano a mano ("mahno ah mahno") means directly or face-to-face confrontation - i get the image of two bulls facing each other with their nostrils flaring.

Well, that's all for now!

Sometime you just have to take risks!

2007-04-25T09:06:00.000+08:00

Caption: But some risks are worth taking!:D

I just love the picture!

Compassion, the fuel to humanity

2007-04-19T10:00:00.000+08:00

Compassion is...the most basic and yet the most significant element that differentiates humans from other beings. It is an inherent quality that allow us to feel empathy towards other humans and living beings, to be able to share the sufferings of others and to want to relieve them.

A few days back, pixie girl told me that her pet hermit crab, Sebastian, died. She cried trying to coax the already dead crab, back to life. It may be a small thing but most of the times it is the small things that tell you more about a person than anything else.

It triggered a memory when i was about 10 or 11 years old. I found a baby bird that was lying on the ground in front of our porch. It must have fallen off the roof (we usually have birds nesting on our roof). So i picked it carefully as it was very fragile. My mom said it needed a nest to keep warm, being a nestling. So i made substitute nest as natural as possible from dried grass and crushed dried leafs. I fed it soft rice and water and it was okay.

Unfortunately that same day, some visitors dropped in. They advised that we feed the baby bird with milk. Being young and stupid, i followed their advised. Needless to say, the next morning i found the bird stiff and lifeless! I cried and cried as i prepared to bury the bird. A part of me was torn from guilt that i killed a harmless bird, another part angry at those visitors who gave the wrong advise (i later found out that milk is the most hazardous form of feed for baby birds). Then there was a part of me that cried for the life lost, a life that had barely even started.

After that, i decided that i will not have any more pets. I refused to hold a life that may be harmed by my own hands! And i did live up to that dictate until a couple of years later when a snow white puppy landed himself at our house. It was an adorable, big doe-eyed puppy who was lost. So we took him in.

I find that compassion is an intangible emotion that is necessary in every human being. It is not just about being compassionate towards animals. That compassion must also extend to fellow human beings, to their plights and sufferings. That is why tragedies usually bring people together most often that not.

Tiff at work

2007-04-18T14:03:00.000+08:00

I had a fight with an obnoxious and sanctimonious colleague from the media department. Actually more of an indignation on behalf of pixie girl. Perhaps, i don't have the right to voice out my disapproval but i couldn't help myself.

Everytime me and pixie girl walk pass him to either go for lunch or go back home, he seem to waylay pixie girl, just to get her to do something for him. The first few time, it was fine but it seems like its becoming a habit or a regular affair. Almost as if he can't stand to see her go! I feel he treats her like his slave or something.

He gives her menial jobs like making phonecalls or typing some information onto computer worksheets. The kind of job that he can surely do by himself. Before he came, she was getting along just fine. Just because she used to be his part-time assistant does not mean that he can consider her to be under his supervision again. (He resigned some time ago from the black den and just recently came back).

Anyway, what happened was, me and pixie girl were going to buy lunch when he stopped her. Pixie girl told me that he wanted her to make a call (Like-lah he can't make the call himself!). So i went off alone.

When i came back, one my colleague was wondering why pixie girl was not with me (i was buying for 3 other colleagues- could have used some help). So i made a deliberate comment in front of the obnoxious fellow and left.

He came looking for me to ask me to "explain" my comment. So, being the direct person that i am. I did the only natural thing. I told him off! Then he started getting defensive and said that it was an "urgent" call that was needed to be made. (Like i said earlier, he could have made the call himself!). I didn't want to make the issue big so i told him that it was not a big issue. But he would NOT let go! Such a crank!

Anyway, i did what i thought was the next best thing. I just shook my head and pretended that he was right (which probably came off like he was being such as baby but i am just humouring him). Well, i WAS just humouring him anyways. Finally he went away! Thank God! I thought he would never leave.

But, someone advised me later that i should not have gotten involved (sort of like don't fight someone else's battle). It is definitely a good advise but i just can't seem to help myself especially when it involves my friends. I guess i am quite protective of friends and people i mingle with closely. But sadly, sometimes some people may not appreciate what you try to do for them. So it is definitely better to just stay away.

There's always a lesson to be learnt at the end of the day!

Thank god my mom doesn't know I blog!

2007-04-11T17:08:00.000+08:00

Read this somewhere and kept it...:-)

What My Mother Taught Me:

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE:
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside -- I just finished
cleaning!"

2. My mother taught me RELIGION:
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL:
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC:
"Because I said so, that's why!"

5. My mother taught me FORESIGHT:
"Be sure you wear clean underwear in case you're in an accident."

6. My mother taught me IRONY:
"Keep laughing and I'll give you something to cry about."

7. My mother taught me about OSMOSIS:
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper!"

8. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM:
"Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck!"

9. My mother taught me about STAMINA:
"You'll sit there 'til all that spinach is finished."

10. My mother taught me about WEATHER:
"It looks as if a tornado swept through your room."

11. My mother taught me how to solve PHYSICS PROBLEMS:
"If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you, would you listen then?"

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY:
"If I've told you once, I've told you a million times -- don't exaggerate!!!"

13. My mother taught me THE CIRCLE OF LIFE:
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION:
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY:
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do!"

My Visual DNA...

2007-04-11T10:08:00.000+08:00

Saw this on my pal's blog (the harlequine). Decided to try it out. It was pretty cool!:)

Read my VisualDNA™ Get your own VisualDNA™

Weekend of CD rampage

2007-04-02T11:53:00.000+08:00

I've been on a CD rampage during the weekend. I bought 'Bridge to Terabithia' (more for kids and new teenagers), 'Pan's Labyrinth' (which is an exceptional Spanish film), then i bought 'Eragon', 'Reign of Fire' and 'DragonHeart'. The latter three came in a 3 in 1 DVD series. I have yet to watch them.

The week before, i watched 'Ghost Rider' (weirdly fascinating but unfulfilling), 'The Prestige' (too slow for my liking, a film about two rival magician, a bit macabre but a good story). Wanted to buy 'Night at the Museum' (actually i did buy but it wouldn't play) so I took it back. They had no spare copies. I was a bit disappointed about that because i was looking forward to watching it.

I was practically in and out of the Video shop throughout the weekend. Got me thinking, do people suddenly get bitten a bug or something before they go around doing something rash and be completely UN-like themselves? Or is it just me?

This was not my only rampaging act. I've been on other rampages recently as well. A couple of weeks back i was on a rampage with books. I was buying books (more than 3 books)practically every week. Then, there was this time when i went to the convenience store at the black den to stock up on my chocolates (i didn't need to because i still have choc packets unopened,untouched. I even went grocery shopping almost everyday after work buying things like cereal boxes, milk carton, sausages, and fruits.

It was not surpising that March has been a very broke month for me. Right now, i have this urge to go down to KLCC to get two books (i reserved it online). But i'm trying to hold back on buying in case i get the urge to buy again next week. (If that makes any sense:P)

Uncertainty assails me!

2007-03-13T11:51:00.000+08:00

Work at the black den makes me think twice about what i want to do in life. I know i would like to write a book. In fact, i even wrote to uncle Sam about this idea. He was very supportive and even gave me idea on what to write: jatropha plant (biodiesel alternative) and jasmine perfume industry.

Both are new and blooming industries that opens up loads of possibilities and opportunities. However, i am not sure where to begin. I'm afraid i'll be stuck with the technical aspects as well as in knowledge and experience.

I feel i have not been exposed to the world enough to attempt writing on these topics. I always thought that i would be writing fiction. I find that i can express myself more freely when i am writing fictional piece rather than a non-fiction/ factual topic. Nevertheless, writing a non-fiction script does have a more substantial feeling of accomplishment. But then so would a fictional story. I was also thinking about writing children's book. But again i find difficulty in where to begin.

Honest to goodness, i wish there was someone out there who could sponsor me to complete my Masters in Journalism. I would love the opportunity to travel overseas, Canada, Italy, Ireland, Africa and India. The exposure alone would give me good ground/ foundation to my story as well as essence, colour and depth to my story.

The black den is only one of the pit stops in my journey of self-discovery and to gain experience in all the fields of writing. So far, i have tried my hand at editorial writing, magazine writing, business writing, and now copy writing (advertising). Though all of those experiences were for a brief period of time only.

Treat to self...

2007-02-13T10:11:00.000+08:00

Yesterday after work, i went to Ampang Point shopping complex with a mission. Ear piercing and new sandals! Yes, i went to get third piercing on both ears. I totally underestimated the pain and had to endure it in silence throughout the night. It is still stinging today but with lesser vengeance. Thank god for that. But i am so pleased with the extra piercing!

I also got two new sandals. Flat ones so that it will be more comfortable to walk. My leg/ knee is healing well but i still can't bend my right leg fully. I have trouble walking up and down staircases. The sandals that i was using broke. And i had only heels left to wear. So i endured walking on heel for the past few days even with my knee. It was a miracle that i haven't fallen on my face yet. Really!

I decided it's high time i got a flat sandal. I ended up getting two flat sandals! It was the usual stroke of undecisiveness in me. *sigh* It cost me about RM60. But it was Bata shoes, so i told myself, IT HAD BETTER BE WORTH IT!

Once in a while, it is good to treat your self with something. Make yourself feel good!

Life is running sloooww

2007-02-09T15:21:00.000+08:00

The past couple of days have been running s-l-o-w. Just can't wait for next week for the Chinese New Year holidays!!! After the short excitement on Monday about the tragic, freak accident, life has been boring and moving in slow-motion. Of course, there were moments when the office was in absolute frenzy as they are busy preparing for the Turkish and Polish exhibitions. But still i find time moving sluggishly. *sigh*

Oh! About the tragic accident...there is no conclusive statement but it seems that the hand-brake may have been faulty. The girl apparently tried stopping the car from sliding forward. On the process, she may have tripped on the uneven ground and fell hitting her head. Hence the broken neck.

Apparently, she came to office with a collegue. Normally, they would walk together from the parking lot. The irony was that, on that particular day, she dropped her friend in front of the main entrance and drove off to the parking lot. And never returned! The last thing that the colleague heard was the girl's screams.

I guess that's what you call FATE! Sometimes things just happen for a reason, even when it seems like there is none.

Tragedy strikes the black den!

2007-02-06T15:03:00.000+08:00

A girl was found dead under a car, at the parking lot outside the black den.

This morning when i walked into the office, i was surprised to see jolene and ambi staring out the window. I joined them when they told me that a girl was found with her legs sticking out from under a car. We watched as the fire brigade and polis buzzed about the area. There was not much that we could really see as we were at least 300-500m away. Our office was on the third floor so we could pretty much see the whole scene from afar.

Speculations say that the girl (a staff working at the ArtShop) forgot to pull her handbreak up. She probably dropped something under the car and bent down to pick it up when the car moved. Apparently, she broke her neck.

But some things just don't add up. How is it that her legs were crossed. One of my colleague, Hema, saw her leg sticking as she was walking passed the area. By then the police were already there. Apparently, the girl was positioned between the tires. (Which tires? From front or side? It is not clear.

The car was parked on an uneven parking lot. But the car did not seemed to have moved much to cause a death.

This brings me to another topic...Death! It is so illusive! You never know when it strikes. What is the point of taking the life of a girl who is only in her early 20s. Why should death claim her in a freak accident like this? What is the point of having a baby? To bring her up, to feed her, to clothe her, to educate her, to watch her blossom and grow into adulthood. Only to have her life snatched by death!

Death...one of life's greatest mysteries!

Life's unique surprises!

2007-02-02T15:46:00.000+08:00

Last Wednesday was a very nice and uneventful day. Until i fell on a gravelly walk-path and scraped my knee. It needed 15 external stitches and 5 internal stitches. I really thought it was a peaceful day.*bemused* Being in the field that i am in (advertising), a peaceful day is hard to come by, especially so when the president of the black den was still in London.

Anyway, it was about 6.30pm when i was walking out of the black den towards the bus stop at the main road. The walk-path is rather new and it was uneven with small stones scattered along its gravelly wake. Coming out of the black den is like walking down a hill. Hence, i was walking along the gravelly walk-path down the slope. And suddenly, i felt my leg fold as i landed hard on my right knee while bracing the ground with my hands. Being aware that there was a car parked paralelled to where i fell. I stood up quickly and brushed the dirt remnants off my slacks. I felt so embarassed! I pretended it was nothing and continued walking on as if nothing occurred. But i could feel the sharp stinging sensation. And after some time, i could feel my knee wet. Once i reached the place where i waited for my bus, i pulled up my slack to my knee.

The sight could have made dainty women swoon (or so to speak). Even i felt a little lightheaded after looking at it. I immediately pulled down my slack. It looked like Edward Scissorhand had left his mark on my knee. It was a deep cut with small fragments of flesh sticking to my slacks.*shivers* God, it was gory. There was blood flowing down my leg and soaking my slacks. Thank god for black slacks and the corporate image of the black den.

On the way back, i kept replacing tissue after tissue to stop the blood flow. When I reached home, my parents took one look at it and declared that it needed stiches. We went to a clinic not far from home. The doctor was quite thorough and very efficient with the stitches which came with a tetanus jab. He charged me a bomb too! And told me to come back the next day to check if i had torn the stitches. The next day, he changed the dressing and gave seven days of medical leave. And then charged me some more. He told me to come back on Feb 3rd to remove the stitches.

Fast forwarding to today, it is my first day at work since my mishap. I am limping about just fine. Short of feeling crippled and unwhole, well, i am just fine!

Unproductivity...

2007-01-17T10:38:00.000+08:00

I HATE the state of unproductiveness! I absolutely hate it! hate it! hate it! It makes me feel so useless. I am a person who mentally make plans for the day. I need things to do to keep me occupied. If not, I tend to do a lot of thinking. And that puts me at a state of depression. I refuse to be depressed! I have not had things easy in life or at least as easy as people around me. If i indulge in thinking about matters, I get melancholic. And I refuse to be melancholic. I have adopted optimism to be able to handle difficult situations and problems that arise. The happy facade i put on almost every day helps me get by. The smile is only a mask that hides my inner turmoil. I can't talk to anyone. I can't get close to anyone. I long for a friend whom i can trust...But where do i find such a friend? Silently, i bear it all like a bottle.

Weird Dream

2007-01-16T10:24:00.000+08:00

A few days back i had a weird dream. Though at the time it seemed very real in my mind. I remember some parts vividly, even as other parts are a blur. It starts off like this...

For some vague reasons, my siblings and I were walking over to our neighbour's house. It was a terrace house with a garden that had tall green pine trees. There were high brick wall built around the house. The garden was a beautiful place that reminded me of the Secret Garden. The further we walked, the deeper the path went. And finally, we reached a pond, which was beautifully lanscaped. There were even stepping stones, smooth as pebbles, leading up to the pond. It was the size of a medium swimming pool.

It all seemed so ethereal, like a beautiful scene straight out of a fairy tale. The next thing i knew, we took a dive to go swimming...in our clothes. We were diving deeper and deeper into the pond.

It was unusually dark and gloomy underwater. Yet, somehow it had the aura of serenity and peacefulness. And the water was cool and clear. Amazingly, we were never short of breath. We just kept on swimming. Gliding among the long flowing sea-weeds, and tall, dark green plants. It felt as if the place held a calm that cannot be found elsewhere. It was very relaxing. Finally, after what seemed like an hour, we resurfaced to the middle of the pond. Floating in the water surface, we suddenly realised that the pond was more like a lake. But, somehow we were happy and care-free. Not few minutes had passed, before we dived back into the water. It was as if the pond had secrets and an unexplicable pull that keeps us wanting to dive deeper. When we were underwater, the time seemed to be in a standstill.

Anyway, sometime later, I resurfaced again. Only this time it was near a boulder. In a beach. A beach that had clear, blue water and endless azure sky. And there were other people swimming at the beach. Families, kids, fathers and mothers. But strangely, there were no resorts, no hotels, no restrooms. It was like an uncharted island. That was where the dream ended. I don't recall if my sister and brother were with me on the beach.

The weirdest part of it all is that i've had this dream before...years ago during my higher secondary school year. That it should suddenly come again in the same manner, evoking the same emotions...is simply...!!! *shivers*

My timeless oasis...

2007-01-11T09:38:00.000+08:00

Finally! I have gotten around to creating my own blogspot. My cyber space...my private but not so private thoughts blog...my very own timeless oasis!!!

Timeless Oasis...Hmmm, I guess I chose this name because I believe that there is an alternate dimension where everything is peaceful, quiet, perfect and ideal. Which is only natural, being a person who is very into elves, dragons, unicorns, the fae folks and all things magical and mythical.

Anyway, i think timeless oasis kind of defines cyber space in a way. An endless space where you can express your thoughts and feelings freely.

I like to observe people around me. You'll be surprised how much you can learn about people and their character just by being a silent observer. Sometimes, they are quite entertaining. At the same time, you get to learn something about yourself. I am naturally quiet around strangers, and not-so-quiet with my close friends. I find peace in solitude and quiet pursuits. And because i get to write whatever i want in this blog, i'm gonna call myself 'the scribbler'.